Big Brothers and Little Sister

Owen stayed home from school on Wednesday with a cold. It was just a little cold, but he had been up much of the night, struggling to sleep through the sneezing, runny nose, watery eyes, etc. So, we kept him home for some R&R. Meera was thrilled to have Owen home, all to herself. The two of them have a special bond. It is what I imagine as the quintessential big-brother-little-sister relationship. My heart practically explodes just thinking about it. Words cannot do it justice, so I won’t even try. I just know that these two have something extraordinarily special. Something precious, rare, and wonder-filled. I am so happy for them.

Kyle and Meera. These two have something extraordinary too. And so different from the relationship between Owen and Meera. One vignette (amongst many): Last Friday I took Meera grocery shopping while the boys were at school. On our way out of the grocery store Meera spotted a scarecrow amongst a display of potted mums. She went crazy for the scarecrow, insisting that I get it down from amongst the mums so that she could see it up close. She checked out every detail of it, hugged it, kissed it, and told me how much she loved it– “Meera loves scarecrow! I love it! Mommy, I love scarecrow!” Several people walked by during this, commenting on how “cute” it was and how I better “not even think about leaving without buying that scarecrow for her!” etc. I looked at the price tag: $6.99. I thought about buying it, but wouldn’t let myself… it seemed ridiculous, frivolous, and I didn’t want Meera to think I’d just buy her anything she’d go ga-ga over at the store. She was upset that she couldn’t bring it home. But Meera’s a tough little cookie and it takes a lot for her to express upset in anything but the mildest fashion (rare fussing and even rarer tantrums). Later that day I had to go back to the grocery store because I had forgotten one ingredient that we needed. I brought Kyle with me this time. As we were heading into the store he pointed out the scarecrow to me and said, “Meera would love that.” I stopped dead in my tracks. “Kyle,” I said, “I was just here with her this morning and she did love it! She loved it so much, she really wanted to bring it home.” “Why didn’t you buy it for her?” he asked. “Well,” I searched for an adequate explanation, “we don’t need it, and, well, I don’t know, I just didn’t think we should buy it for her.” Kyle was outraged. “You should have!” he said, “She never asks for anything!” he said, “She’d love it!” he said. “How much does it cost?” he asked. “Six dollars and ninety-nine cents,” I said. He then told me that he was going to buy it for her– “Ok, then, if you won’t buy it for her, I will. I’m going to use my own money from the Tooth Fairy to get it for her.” He told me that the next time we went to the store he was going to bring his money to buy the scarecrow for Meera. He could not bear the thought of anything otherwise. This Tuesday, on my way home from work, I stopped at that store and spent the $6.99 to buy the scarecrow… for Meera… and so that Kyle wouldn’t have to buy it. When I arrived home with it they were both ecstatic, jumping up and down at the sight of it, thrilled, shouting, “Thank you Mama! Thank you Mama!” The plan was to put it outside in our front garden. However, it has been inside this whole week, right next to Meera’s little play area in our kitchen, with Kyle and Meera spending lots of time with it.

Today, being Friday, I was home with Meera for the morning while the boys were at school. I watched as she played and played. At one point she played for a long stretch of time with three toy ‘Little People’ that she pulled out from our small collection of them. I watched as she selected the three very carefully from the bunch. Over and over she lined them up on the playroom table, ever-so-carefully to ensure that they were all three “holding hands.” Always in the same order (in her words)– “Owen, this one with blue hat”; “Meera, this one with yellow hat”; and “Kyle, this one with red hat.”