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One Heck of a Day

Posted by | January 18, 2011 | BAMBINOS | 25 Comments

after class

I could write a novel about today… seriously… but I’m too exhausted to even figure out a clever way to write this blog post. I surely will not be able to do this day justice, but hopefully this will jog my memory enough in the future so that the whole thing will come flooding right back to me. At this point it is hard to fathom that I’ll ever not remember every vivid detail. Seriously. It was one heck of a day.

It started with the dreaded 5:30 a.m. wake-up call: “School Cancelled.” Braydon looked out the window and clicked on the news: “Wintery Mix.” The t.v. stayed on, listing all the cancellations, while we all fell into a haze of semi-sleep and semi-Sesame-Street-viewing. Margie called at 7:30 to inform us that she was not willing to come given the weather conditions. (Today was supposed to be Margie’s first day back.) O.k. This scenario is not always entirely bad, except that today was the first day of spring semester classes at Lehigh. And, of course, Lehigh is never closed. And so, no matter what, I absolutely had to be there for the first day of class. And, at the same time, Braydon absolutely had to be in New Jersey for a big work event that he absolutely could not miss. Every dual-career-couple-without-extended-family-anywhere-in-their-vicinity has been there: that loathsome, dreaded, nightmare of a place: The Snow Day With No Coverage. You look at each other in sheer panic, and you just know that no matter what, it is going to be one heck of a day.

I took one for the team today. I mean, I seriously took a huge one for the team today. I swallowed hard, took a deep breath, and said the words I never in a million years would have ever thought I’d hear myself say: “I’m going to have to take them to class with me.”

I deserve some sort of prize for even offering up this crazily-selfless-and-above-and-beyond-the-call-of-duty-of-a-possibility. But then, folks, I actually ended up doing it: I took all three of my kids to class with me on the first day of class. I deserve some sort of medal, or trophy, or ten pomegranate martinis, or some kind of spectacular prize for having done this. Seriously. Is there anyone out there who gets what I’m saying??? I TOOK THEM TO CLASS WITH ME ON THE FIRST DAY OF CLASS.

First, I loaded them into the car and set out on the icy, slushy, half-plowed, half-salted roads. It was, indeed, a “wintery mix” – snow/rain/sleet/hail/freezing-rain all coming down at once. The roads were a mess. I was white knuckled as I drove 20 miles per hour the entire way with “Toddler Tunes” blaring in the backseat.

We got there and I trekked them across campus, slip-sliding away in the icy mess, to find the building. And then we entered, all four of us, into the classroom… to 30 sets of undergraduate eyes staring up at me in total disbelief. Yes, today I was that professor: the one who brought her kids to class on the first day of class.

And you know what happened? My three bambinos – two of which I don’t trust fully anywhere anytime for all the obvious reasons, and the third of which WHO IS ONLY TWO YEARS OLD – my three bambinos did their mama proud. They were shockingly, unbelievably, glistening-gold-absolutely-perfectly-PERFECT the entire 1-hour-and-fifteen-minute class. I kept waiting for disaster to hit. And it never did. They sat there quietly and completely non-disruptively the entire time. I was shocked. And of course the students loved having them there.

When we left class I was ecstatic. I mean, ecstatic. I could not believe how well they had done. It was also noon, and they were very hungry, and sheets of sleet were falling from the sky, and they said: “Mama, can we please eat lunch on campus?”… and at that moment, honestly, I probably would have done absolutely anything they had asked. And so, against my better judgment I went out on a limb and I said: “Sure!” And I took them where they wanted to go (K & O had eaten there once before): The Faculty Dining Room. Call me crazy. It was a crazy idea: me, alone, with all three of the, in The Faculty Dining Room.

And you know what happened? My three bambinos – two of which I don’t trust fully anywhere anytime for all the obvious reasons, and the third of which WHO IS ONLY TWO YEARS OLD (yes, I know I already said that, but it needs to be repeated) – they once again made their mama proud. They were on their best behavior, charming all the waitresses, and pulling out all the shots to be uber-polite and well-mannered. Again, I was shocked (and ecstatic). They also ate a ton (I mean, a ton), and had the time of their lives. They couldn’t stop talking about how it was all “so fancy” that “even Fancy Nancy would love this place!” (and she would… it is super-duper-old-school-fancy).

Toward the end of the lunch, while the three of them feasted on huge platefuls of coconut-cream-cake and chocolate pie, I sat there practically in a state of shock over how all of this had been going, and this was my one and only thought: ‘After all these years of the constant-daily-vigilant-all-over-them-tight-reigned-exhausting-discipline that is required of raising rambunctious-off-the-charts-energetic-spiritedtwin-boys… (not to mention the day-to-day-hard-work-of-caring-for-a-two-year-old)… after all this… today, right then and there, I could see, feel, hear (and practically taste and smell) it paying off. Paying off in a big, big way. Because, as it turns out, when push came to shove, when they needed to, they did right by me. And that, my friends, is enough to make this mama uber-proud (and shocked, yes! but also uber-proud).

 faculty dining room

After lunch we trekked it back across campus to our car. They wanted to stomp through the icy snow this time, avoiding the pathways, and I didn’t even care. Fine! No problem! They could do anything!

after lunch

We got back in the car for the icy drive home. We stopped at the video store on the way— they could pick anything they wanted to rent— it was their prize for a job well done (and mine— I needed that video-induced-downtime). They chose Cinderella. No problem. I paid the $1 for the 48 hour rental, and didn’t even make any remarks about the ridiculousness that is the Disney Princesses. I just let them love that I was renting it for them. And they were thrilled, and thrilled with themselves. And then we were back in the car again, driving 20 miles per hour the entire time home, but this time I could appreciate the unbelievable beauty of the crystallized trees.

icy drive

It was one heck of a day.

25 Comments

  • OMG Heather… I was right there with you the ENTIRE POST!!!! Except, my 2 experiences of taking one or more of my kiddos to class did not go as well as yours. I had to take Hannah with me probably 4 years ago, and right in the middle of my lecture she passed gas soooooooooooooooo loud that my students could not contain themselves. She politely excused herself, but I was so caught off guard and my students were laughing so hard, that it took a few minutes to get back to what I had been saying… :-)

    Then, this past semester I did not teach, due to bringing home Angelina one week before the fall semester started. I had to meet the professor that was filling in the gap for me, and so I took Angelina and Luca with me. After that just 1.5 hours of giving info and syllabuses, etc… I was never so glad to get in my car and drive home. Luca did fine, but Angelina was still sooooooo insecure that every time I needed to talk with the other professor she wanted my attention and did ‘anything’–fill in the blank–to get my attention.

    I am sooooooo glad that you had that experience today! I know how you feel. I had that moment when we went to our annual Christmas Pops Philharmonic concert and an older couple in front of us complimented the kids after the show at how well they did. They love music and did not talk or move an inch the entire concert. They then turned to us and said, “you must be doing something right… keep up the good work”. Those moments are so precious and so fleeting when we are in the day to day grind!!!

    Cheers to your spring semester. I am soooo excited to start teaching again this semester!

    • Heather says:

      Oh Rebekah, I feel for you! I didn’t mention it in my post, but today toward the end of class Meera burped — it was pretty quiet and probably nobody would have noticed, but then she said, very loudly, “I burped!” –which EVERYONE heard– And then, “Excuse me!” and everyone laughed. A minute later she announced, “I did another burp! Excuse me!” And everyone laughed. It was just cute and endearing though, thankfully not embarrassing (one of my major fears was that K or O would loudly and obnoxiously –as you say– ‘pass gas’… but shockingly they did not). Thanks for reading!!!

  • heather says:

    Wonderful story Heather! Kudos to you for remembering to remember moments when everything doesn’t, miraculously, fall apart. We all remember the moments when chaos reigns, so it’s a great thing to note when it does not. Kudos to K, O and M too – for doing their Mama proud!

  • Maggie B. says:

    Oh my gosh, Heather!!! I totally relate! That is an amazing story, and YES, every 2-working-parent-without-nearby-relatives’ greatest fear! How incredible that the bambinos rose to the occasion. What a gratifying moment for you. And I am sure the kids LOVED seeing you as the other you–the professor you. They clearly respected every moment that other you was up there teaching! WOW. What a day.

    I once had to appear in court before a judge with one of my babies in the sling on my hip. I had no child care, and the client needed me there…oh my, it was a hoot. I will never forget it!

    Great, great work. Thanks for the awesome story!

  • Mary Pierznik says:

    Whoa, that stresses me out just thinking about it. I’ve never had to take kids to the hospital, but have come close. This post gives me hope that all of the work does pay off somehow. I can’t imagine how stressful it was during your class, with 1/2 of your brain on the kids, 1/2 on the class. Good work!!
    PS Can you imagine if your husband showed up to a meeting with kids???

  • Kate says:

    Hi,

    Wow!! Well done to Kyle, Owen and Meera for doing you proud!!! And to you for handling the situation well. Man I wish I was there to witness it! It’s such a shame that Western modern society in most professions requires a very clear cut divide between the domestic sphere and the public sphere and hence the double burden (mainly working mothers) face. It’s great that your kids got the opportunity to see you working and appreciate the gifts you give the world!
    And, wow your faculty dining room is amaaaazing!!!
    -Kate

  • Gail says:

    Heather,

    I can’t stop laughing. That the three of them could have contained themselves is truly miraculous. Truly. But then, they are remarkable in so many ways including having amazingly good manners almost all the time.

  • Sarah says:

    I was on pins and needles the whole post. So glad that they did you proud! Phew! Hope you don’t have another ‘snow day’ with no backup any time soon!!

  • shannon says:

    This deserves a bit giant shout of HOOT HOOT! YEE HAW! (sorry- too much toy story)

  • Cathy from up in the VT says:

    Heather, I love this post. Well played, J-Ms, well played.

    I can empathize. I’ve had to take one or both of my kids with me reporting on various events (which usually goes ok), and once to a staff meeting (which was a disaster). Much worse, I think, is getting the call from daycare that one of them is sick and has to be taken home immediately. We only have one car, and whoever has it that day is it.

    Thanks for posting. Miss you guys!

  • Nancy says:

    I know you were breathing a sigh of relief!! I’ve had to bring 1 to work – and she’s a very quiet one, but 3????? And for the first day of class! They do deserve all the treats you gave them!

    Just curious – does the university not have a childcare facility that allows faculty to drop-ins? Best! Nancy

  • Carol says:

    H*ly cow. I read this first thing this morning before anyone else had commented and I’ve been thinking about it and relating it to others, all day long. So glad they got it together when you needed it most. Bravo, J-M kiddos.

    It made a delightful story and your mother is infinitely grateful you “were there for her” although you don’t yet even know what that means.

    huggies to all

  • TRPL says:

    Here is to no more snow days — super glad you got through it. A test of your patience and you passed. :) Strong work O, K and M!!!

  • Ashley McCain says:

    What a frustrating parenting dilemma to have during a snow day!
    I can totally understand your sitter not feeling comfortable driving in snow and ice though. I, myself, cannot stand to drive in bad weather conditions. It scares me so much!
    You are so lucky that bringing your kids to work is only for a hour and 15 minute day though and not for a entire 8 hour day! That is just awesome!
    So glad that the kiddos did great and that everyone had a wonderful day! The faculty dining room sounds like it was a nice treat for the kids!

  • Ashley McCain says:

    Oh I meant to ask if you brought stuff with you to occupy the kids, like coloring books or if they just were able to sit quietly on their own?

  • LisaH says:

    Oh I can so RELATE! I have 3 kids too and have been in the exact same situation. And have had to take them to work! Thank you for the story. It is so refreshing to know I am not the only one in this position trying to balance work, family, etc. with no extended family around. Take care! and keep up the good work!

  • jess says:

    Suspenseful! And I agree: well played all around.

    But I think I would’ve canceled class. Did that cross your mind, and why didn’t you? Curious. I may be getting cynical in my old adjuncting age.

    I’ve brought my kids, never to the first day though. They ham it up and when it’s all over, I realized how very tense the experience made me. But – I also agree that it’s a great learning experience for kids to see Mom with a different hat on.

  • Dori Moerer says:

    WOW! That sounds like a wonderful end to what could have been a really stressful day. Sounds like your kids really “knocked this one out of the park”, as they say! I look forward to experiencing a moment like this someday when my husband and I become parents. Thanks for sharing.

  • Sarah Kate says:

    Well done!

  • Nikki says:

    That is so great!!

    By the way, I am able to design wordpress blogs now, if you are still interested! Right now am raising money through http://www.madebynikki.blogspot.com for the Education Fund of a girl I support in the DR, Andrielis.

  • Azeezah says:

    thank you Heather for sharing these details of a harrowing day and also to Ashley for pointing out that while taking children to class is stressful, there are in fact far more stressful situations, such as having the children at work for a full eight hour day! I am also an academic and have come close to having to tote my kids to the classroom, but luckily (so far) I live near enough to the university that someone could run over and fill in while I raced to class, taught, then quickly ran back again. I think that as academics we are particularly prone to see our life as professors as utterly distinct from our life as mothers, reifying a mind/body split and mystifying our intellectual life, so that when the categories collide we experience it as a crisis.

  • Beth Follum Hoffman says:

    HBJ-M
    I have come to adore your blog since your mom pointed me towards it a while back. I appreciate the ease of reading and the sense of justice and joy that permeates the writing and the photos. My kids ( 16 and 12 ) are now huge fans of your family Caesar salad. As I was reading this post as a working mom with PK kids I loved that I too knew that deep inside smile that found its way out in crazy unexpectedly perfect days.
    But then I remembered how your Dad and Mom took you to work every summer in 86 and 87 when I was at CCL counseling and I remembered that you were pretty incredible then as well. Pretty perfect. Too bad there wasn’t a Fancy Nancy faculty dining hall for you to feast in.
    Peace and adventure to you and your bambinos.
    – Beth

  • Emily S. says:

    Prof. Johnson! I am SO upset that I missed this epic day. I would have given *anything* to be in one of your classes…. I was only lucky enough to hear the buzz on campus about your darlings making guest appearances. Please figure out a way to bring them back and let me know ahead of time!

  • Jonez says:

    Yay, for well behaved Bambinos! I’m glad they did you proud.

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