Back to First Fridays – and one of the best yet!

For me, this picture is a great symbolic representation of why our “First Fridays” (<–click for backstory) are so awesome and important.  In the bathroom of the restaurant last night, Meera discovered her “most favorite sink in the whole entire wide world.” It was, for sure, a very cool sink. We’d never seen anything like it. She could have played in that sink for hours. In normal circumstances (out with our whole family, out with friends or extended family, out with anyone), we’d have been rushed to get back to the table and join the group. But on a ‘First Friday’ the point is to be fully present in the moment of indulging in time with just one kids. To be able to go with what that one –and only that one– is interested in, to be able to talk about what that one –and only that one– wants to talk about, to be able to do what that one –and only that one– would want to do. Braydon and I plan the agenda for the First Fridays, but we plan them with what the one –and only the one– in mind. And last night, I stood in that bathroom for a solid ten minutes letting her admire that sink and play in that water.

We started First Fridays in the spring of 2011 and did them religiously for 3 years. But in the past year we had taken a break of about 12 months from our First Fridays. We had sort of come to not appreciate them as much as we had been, and the kids had come to expect them (almost feel entitled to them; getting in the way of truly appreciating them and losing the main point of them). But lately we’ve been all missing them a lot, thinking about them a lot, and talking about them a lot. We decided to pick back up. And we started last night with a Mommy-and-Meera ‘First Friday.’

We went to one of Meera’s favorite restaurants — a Thai restaurant that she loves. She loves the lettuce wraps there, the sticky rice, and the chicken satay. We had it all and she “ooohed” and “aaahhed” over every bite. Then we went to a paint-your-own-pottery place. Meeera had been there before a few times, but I had never been. She was so thrilled to introduce me to it, and to have me there painting our chosen pieces together. Classic Meera, she chose a sweet heart box (“to hold my most special necklaces in!”), and painted it with her quintessential colors of pink and purple. She thought I was crazy, choosing an Easter item– a spring chick, but she approved of my choice of colors for it– various shades of yellow with some pink and purple detail. We painted for over two hours– something that amazed and delighted Meera (the ability to just sit for that long, painting, with no rush, and with nobody critiquing the extensive amount of detail we were both putting into our masterpieces). As for me, I was happily surprised to discover how relaxing the whole paint-your-own-pottery-place thing was for me. I had thought I’d think that place was a rip-off and hokey… but my daughter proved me wrong… yet again (this girl is always proving me wrong; one of the things I love and appreciate most about my girl).

I never lose sight of how grateful I am for Meera, how much I adore her essence, and how much I can — and do — learn from her. I think about those things everyday. But there’s something special about what happens when I get her all to myself. Last night was probably my favorite First Friday ever, and a reminder of how important it is for us to continue these, even as our days get more and more crazed, and the years go faster and faster, and our bambinos get older and older. One-on-one time is absolutely key… especially in light of those realities.