There is lots of research and literature in the academic, clinical, and popular presses about what most-of-us-common-folk-parents-of-twins call “TwinSpeak.” Of course there are lots of better more clinical more sophisticated ways to explain it, I’m sure, but here’s the gist of it:
TwinSpeak is that ‘secret language’ known to be shared amongst many twins and multiples. TwinSpeak is when twins start babbling as babies, then speaking as toddlers, and they use words and/or phrases (and/or create whole languages) that they — and only they — understand. It is basically when twins develop a verbal form of communication all their own. TwinSpeak includes when twins use words that only each other understand, or when they continue to refer to things in a specific “twinspeak” way despite knowing the “correct” way. It is really interesting. And it is one of the things that makes parenting twins really different than parenting other children. Kyle and Owen have had lots of interesting phases of TwinSpeak over time. I could write tons about this. But for now, I just want to write about one tiny little instance that happened today on our way to daycare.
In the back seat of the “New Blue Car” the boys were chit-chatting along, as usual. It was quiet for a bit then Owen — with his fingers fiddling around with his eyes/eyeballs — suddenly announced: “See my TomKat?!”
He said it again, “SEE MY TOMKAT?!” I was desperately trying to understand what he was saying, so I was silent for a second. Owen said, “Hey, Kyle, see my TomKat?!”
Here’s what then transpired:
Kyle: “Yeah, Owen, I see TomKat!”
Owen: “You have TomKat Kyle?”
Kyle: “Yeah, Owen, I have TomKat.”
Owen: “You see my TomKat?”
Kyle (now with his fingers fiddling around with his eyes/eyeballs too): “Yeah, Owen, see my TomKat?!”
Owen: “Yeah, Kyle I see your TomKat. You like TomKat?”
Kyle: “Yeah, I like TomKat!”
Owen: “I like TomKat too!”
Kyle: “Yay TomKat!”
I was dumbfounded. Given the country’s recent fascination and craze (o.k., I admit it: my recent fascination and craze too) over The TomKat (i.e. Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes: “TomKat” — click here if you have been living in a bubble for the past year and don’t know what I’m talking about)… the first thought I had was, “My god! Am I that pathetic of an in-the-closet-People-Magazine-reading-“TomKat”-junkie that my two year olds have somehow picked up on this TomKat craze thing?????!!!!!!! My god! How do they know about TOMKAT?!!!” I wracked my brain to try to remember ever even mentioning TomKat in front of my toddlers. Meanwhile, they continue on with their TomKat conversation in the backseat.
Then it occurred to me, “Wait a minute! Why are they fiddling with their eyes like that?! What does that have to do with Tom and Katie?” And suddenly I was able to translate their TwinSpeak to english (something I’m not very often successful at doing) —- I loudly said, “Hey, boys!” to try to interrupt their boistrous TomKat conversation:
Me: “Are you talking about contacts?! Are you pretending you have contacts in your eyes!?”
Owen: “Yeah Mama! TomKats!”
Me: “It is contacts — you say it, c-o-n-t-a-c-t-s.”
Owen: “T-o-m-K-a-t-s.”
Kyle: “You have TomKats Owen?!”
Owen, “Yeah, Kyle, I have TomKats!”
Kyle: “Owen, you see my TomKat?”
Owen: “Yeah, Kyle, I see your TomKat. You like TomKat?”
Kyle: “Yeah, I like TomKat!”
Owen: “I like TomKat too!”…
… and so it goes…
Just another day as ThirdWheel-Mama to my TwinSpeak-Twins.
Yesterday my Owen took one step closer to becoming a man. Granted he still has a ways to go, but this was a big deal.
We went to Olive Garden (a whole ‘nother story for sure) to celebrate getting our new car (see Heather’s post). We hit it at prime dining around 7 PM – things pretty much clear out after 8:30 – but we had a 1/2 hour wait. What to do?
It’s always a dilemma when we need to wait in confined space where there are expectations for no running – no jumping – no screaming – no bothering other people. What to do? Heather took Kyle and waited inside with him (which he is pretty good at). I took Owen outside to play on the sidewalk.
We practiced running and racing. After about 45 seconds of that we had to move on to something else. We practiced jumping off the bench as far as we could. That lasted much longer, but since it’s more dangerous, it naturally would.
After about ten minutes he was ready to go inside. What to do now?!? Heather suggested changing diapers – no even better – Owen goes on the potty in the restaurant. Great idea for a 10 minute activity.
Here is the big deal: we went inside and were the only ones in the restroom. I pointed to the urinals – “Do you want to go potty in a urinal? You say it – urinal.” He pointed to the big one – “ruhnal”. “That one is too big – that one [the short one] is your urinal.” Without going into detail (although father’s with sons can imagine quite well), he did a great job and didn’t miss a drop. Yahoo! But the most fun part – reaching up (pants still down), grabbing the handle and flushing. He did it – yahoo!
Just need to teach him to not touch the urinal screen and deodorizer block….
Today we bought a new car and traded in our black Acura MDX. Absolutely ridiculous, I know– but I get very sentimental about things like this. I feel so sad to part ways with the “black car” (as K & O so fondly referred to it). The “black car” is the car we drove the boys home from the airport in. They rode in their carseats backwards as little babies, until they turned one, in the “black car.” We had our first family road trips together in the “black car.” They learned all about their beloved orchestral/symphonic music in the “black car.” It makes me sad to say goodbye to Black Car. We had good times in Black Car…
Here are some Black Car photos from this past weekend:
But unlike me, the boys seemed to have no sentimental issues whatsoever with saying goodbye to Black Car. In fact, they embraced the entire thing no questions asked. They jumped at the chance to “go to the car store” knowing full well that we would be leaving Black Car there and driving off with “New Blue Car.” They happily gave Black Car kisses goodbye in the dealership parking lot…
And welcomed the Volkswagon Passat — “New Blue Car” — with open arms —
After the deal was done, we went out to dinner to celebrate “New Blue Car”… Kyle ate his pasta like a madman — no sadness, no weepiness, no Black Car blues…
When New Blue Car was safely parked at home in the garage the boys welcomed it happily — and patted it and kissed it goodnight…
…surely making New Blue Car as happy as a new car can be.
Some days Haiti is on my mind — right at the surface, stuck there all day, no way to push it down. Today was one of those days… as we waited for news from our favorite “Haiti Family” the Livesays. You’ve got to check out their blog if you haven’t already… livesayhaiti.blogspot.com And on today’s post you’ll see their new beautiful Haitian Angel. Every time a new Haitian baby (whatever age- 9 weeks, or 9 months, or 9 years old) comes home, our family rejoices. Today is a GOOD DAY — Phoebe Joy is home! Click Here
Top Ten Kyle & Owen Quotes From the Past Few Days:
- Kyle — After he got into big trouble for sneaking off into the kitchen and playing with Braydon’s cell phone: “Where’s my cell phone? I got no cell phone?????”
- Owen, while throwing his carrotts onto the floor during dinner: “Here kitty kitty, come eat your food kitty kitty!”
- Kyle, opening the door to let Cooper, our cat, outside: “O.k. Cooper, here you go Cooper, you go get birds Cooper. GO GET THE BIRDS!!!”
- Owen, on the drive home from daycare: “Mama, you and Papi go to the restaurant today!” (this is Owen’s not-so-subtle-way of telling us that he wants to have their babysitter, Alex, hang out with them). Upon hearing me respond to Owen by saying “No, we’re not going to a restaurant tonight” Kyle, all disappointed, says: “No restaurant tonight? Oh man!!!”
- Kyle, speaking to the uneaten remainder of a hummus sandwich left on his plate at lunch: “You wait right there! After nap, I no eat you. After nap, I eat Newton cookies!” [Fig Newtons]
- Owen, upon getting in trouble for throwing his cup across the room, desperately trying to deflect any responsibility: “I can’t throw that cup! The wind did it! The wind blew that cup!”
- Kyle, in a ploy to try to get Fig Newtons, pointing to the inside of his mouth: “Mama, I have an owie in there. Owie! It hurts in there! Mama, I need to put Newton cookies in there!”
- Owen, walking around the house holding our cat Cooper in his arms: “See this?!?! This is my baby. This is my baby! Say, ‘hi baby’!”
- Kyle, repeated daily (sometimes multiple times daily), whenever his brother goes poopie on the potty: “I can’t go poopie on the potty today. I go poopie on the potty very, very soon.”
- Owen, in response to the question “Do you want milk or juice?”: “I want beer!”
This short film was made by a high school student.
Click here to go to YouTube and watch the video (or paste into your browser: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjy9q8VekmE)
Owen has always liked buttons. We’ve noticed this, in fact, since our very first moments with him. When we travelled to Haiti to get the boys Braydon was wearing a button-down shirt. As he held our baby on his lap for the very first time in the orphanage Owen was deliriously entertained by touching and chewing on those shirt buttons. Our little “Big O” proceeded to do that practically non-stop for his first few days, and then weeks, with us. Since Braydon wears button-down shirts so often, and since Owen preferred being held by Braydon, and since Braydon held him pretty much 24×7 in the beginning, our baby Owen almost always had this button-biting-button-playing pleasure and my Braydono almost always had the pleasure of a shirt covered with spit. Perhaps it is just a coincidence, but last night the following happened…
Owen was sitting on the changing table and I was getting him into a diaper and pajamas before bed. Owen was staring upward at the hanging shirts on clothes hangers in the boys’ closet. Owen said, “I want to wear that one!” and pointed to a red button down shirt. It is a dress shirt, something that has only been worn once (Kyle wore it to Sadie’s Christmas Dance Recital in Maine over our Christmas vacation; on that evening Owen wore a similar blue button down shirt), the boys only have 2 button-down shirts each right now and they have generally been reserved only for wear to special occassions. I was shocked by Owen doing this since NEVER before has he ever ever ever requested (or even seemed to notice) any piece of clothing – ever! I even went through a phase when I tried hard to get the boys to show some preference/choice/care-at-all for their attire. I failed miserably at getting them on board with style-consciousness. I gave up after awhile since they truly could not care any less about what they are wearing at any given moment. So last night when Owen suddenly said this about the hanging red shirt I had to be sure I wasn’t misunderstanding. I said, “What? Say that again?” And he tugged at the red shirt and said clear as day: “I want to wear that one!” I said, “O.k., you want to wear that shirt to daycare tomorrow?” and he said, “Yup!”
This morning Braydon ironed the red shirt for Owen and another button down shirt for Kyle. As I was putting the red shirt on Owen, my boy was deliriously thrilled with all the buttons: “Look at this button Mama! And this one! And this one! And this one!” Once the shirt was on him, my boy strutted over to the big mirror and took a good long look at his handsome little self. He stood there, pacifier in mouth, lovey lion squeezed tight up to his face, and just smiled at himself. I said: “You look gorgeous!!! I like your shirt!!!” Grinning ear-to-ear he said to me, “Cute alert mommy?” And we did what we do on a lot of mornings: “Cute alert! Cute alert! Sound the sirens! Rrrrr Rrrrr Rrrr! Cute alert!” He could not have been more pleased with himself.
Can’t we just bottle some of that self-confidence now and place it carefully on a shelf so that when he’s about 14 years old we can whip it out and tear off the cap?
Today was the first day that Owen wore a shirt that he had actively independently and unpromptedly PICKED OUT for himself. A button shirt.
Kyle and Owen have been taking their imaginative play up about 100 notches lately. They seem to suddenly be on a whole new plane of play. Recently we have watched as they have pretended to be in boats floating on the ocean; pretended to be driving cars, trucks, airplanes, or motorcycles on roads and over bridges; pretended to be doggies jumping into an imaginary river; and pretended to be Dora the Explorer on adventurous missions. But up until today we have never witnessed either of our boys pretend to be another real person other than themselves.
This evening K & O were playing in the playroom. Kyle was playing with his toy chainsaw — by far his favorite toy right now. As usual he was pretending to cut things with it: the couch, the coffee table, the stairway banister. It was dark outside and he could see his reflection in the playroom windows. He was really getting into it — just loving every minute of watching himself jump around with his beloved chainsaw. Suddenly he looked up at me, and, holding his chainsaw with one hand and pointing to himself with the other hand, announced: “I’m MorFar. I’m MORFAR.” I said, “Oh!? You’re MorFar?” And Kyle said, “Yup! I’m MorFar! Watch me start this chainsaw!” For the next five minutes or so he pretended to be MorFar, starting his chainsaw, cutting “wood” with the chainsaw, starting the chainsaw again, cutting more “wood” with the chainsaw, being MorFar. Kyle absolutely adores his MorFar so it isn’t surprising to us that this is the person he first pretends to be.
A first today for Kyle: taking his play to a whole new level — pretending to be a real person other than himself — being MorFar.
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