Round 2 of the infamous Earning Charts.
This week it was Kyle’s turn to choose the winning activity. He chose ice skating at the indoor rink.
This is not an activity that Braydon and I enjoy (skating around and around and around an indoor skating rink), but then again, we’re not the ones with the earning charts (we’re just the ones providing the earnings!). We figured Meera would last all of 10 minutes on the ice (she had “skated” once before — when she was 2 — but she doesn’t even remember that, and she definitely is a novice skater), so we planned for Braydon to skate, and for me to wait in the wings for Miss Meera to call it quits. Meera, however, had different plans. She had earned this — well and good — and she was going to skate — just like her brothers — for the whole entire time of the rink’s Saturday Open Skating Session. Oh yeah, baby, she “skated” (i.e., poor Braydon held her up and ferried her around and around and around the rink) for the full 1.5 hours. None of the four of them took even a five minute break. I watched, rink-side, as other people’s kids all came on and off the ice — begging for hot chocolate, whining about being tired, complaining of the cold, asking to be “done!” — but not the bambinos. Oh no. They milked it for every ever-loving-minute of their hard-earned skating session. We left the rink with 3 happy kiddos and 1 very sore Papi! We are now in Week Three of the New-Year-Bedtime-Behavior-Earning-Charts. It is Meera’s turn to choose the activity. And then, hopefully, the bad bedtime habits will be broken, and this whole little earning-charts-phase will be no-longer-needed (here’s hoping!).
MLK Day is a “Day On” at K & O’s school. The kids do community service all day, then each class participates in an all-school-assembly where they put on performances of MLK/Civil-Rights/Human-Rights related songs/poetry/etc. It is an inspiring day. The video in post below is of K & O’s class performance of the song “We’re All Swimming to the Other Side.” They had practiced the song for weeks, and had memorized every word. K & O were way into it. They are now, at age 7, quite sophisticated in their understanding of who MLK Jr. was, the importance of his life’s work, and the basic history of slavery-discrimination-the Civil Rights Movement-and the continuing struggle today for civil and human rights for all people. I’m proud of them for being so pro-active in their own grappling with these issues. They understand that the truth is that our family would not have been “possible” (legally at least) not all that long ago. It is all a lot to think about, and we have a long road ahead, but this year’s MLK Day made me feel like we’re at least on the right track.
Zoe, Shelli, and Lori joined us for the MLK event, and then we all went to Friendly’s afterward. It was a perfect way to spend King Day.
(photo credit: the Petch’s blog!)
I had to go away for a quick work trip. I was only gone one night. But still I was pathetically, ridiculously, embarrassingly homesick. Not for my house, but for my home. (Home is where my four are.) Every time it is the same old thing– driving to the airport takes all of my will power; I’d do just about anything to come up with a good excuse to be able to cancel; the lump in my throat is so big I can hardly swallow. I don’t know how mothers of young children who have to do heavy business travel do it. It kills me to go away from home. And I miss Braydon terribly when I’m gone. I hate work trips.
But then I’m luxuriating in the independence and freedom of a whole 3 hours on a plane with nobody to worry about except for myself. And then, even better, I’m in the hotel. Last night, upon checking in, I got a free upgrade to the club level. Gosh do I ever love the club level (the food and drink spreads! the array of fine magazines! the cushy couches! the wi-fi! the all-you-can-drink-cappacino! the service!)… a hotel alone (let alone club level!) is like heaven for a mom. I ordered room service last night. And ate it, alone, with not one interruption, while watching the Travel Channel. We don’t get the Travel Channel at home. I was in the lap of luxury. And then I slept all night long. And got up with only one person (me) to get ready. I love work trips.
As the plane was about to land I felt the re-entry start to kick in. I was away for less than 48 hours, but I know what I’m in for when I return. Everything needs to re-balance and get back on track after Mommy’s been away. Back to the nitty gritty details of it all. Meera is always the biggest challenge– she hates it when I go away, and I pay for it upon my return. And I was running on fumes, having just poured myself into the work I had gone away for. It was freezing cold on the ground in Pennsylvania and I had trouble finding my car keys buried deep in my luggage. I hate work trips.
I drove straight from the airport to surprise Meera by picking her up early at daycare. The look on her face when I walked in the door was precious. She ran into my arms and with her whole tiny 3-year-old body she just hugged me for the longest time. And then she looked up at my with her huge blue eyes and said, “I missed you on your work trip Mommy. I so happy you is home!” I took her to Starbucks for a pink cake pop and a chocolate milk (and I desperately needed coffee). We sat there chatting like only we can. It was sweet and I soaked up every second of it, trying to notice every detail that I had missed while I was gone, and remembering how much I love being home. I love work trips.
For three days now the boys have had these airplanes and space shuttles carefully arranged on the floor in the foyer. At first I thought they were playing “lining up for the runway” (the same play they’ve been playing with their toy airplanes for the past few years). I soon learned, however, that this is a whole different ball game (so to speak). According to K & O, the airplanes and the space shuttles are both in their separate team “huddles,” talking strategy for their big rival match against each other. K & O spend lots of time on the floor making sure that every plane/shuttle is just so, pointing them in precisely the right direction, and making sure that everyone is accounted for. It seems we have ushered in a new era of play.
Well, desperate times call for desperate measures. We’re back to
briberyEarning Charts todeal with bedtimemodify behavior.If truth be told, at this point, Kyle typically has no issues with bedtime behavior. He’s our spirited little eager beaver Type-A perfectionist. He aims to please (often to a fault), and please he does (at least when it comes to going-to-bed). Owen and Meera, however, have no problem making up for at least their’s plus their brother’s fair share of bad-bedtime-behavior. So, mainly for their sake (and especially for Owen’s sake, who continues to struggle with bedtime in a big way), we’ve resorted to pulling out the big guns once again: The J-M Bedtime Behavior Earning Charts. In exchange for a full week of “good bedtime behavior,” the bambinos can earn “something extra fun” on the the weekend.
First up in in 2012, getting to choose the week’s earned activity on behalf of the threesome: Owen. He announced right at the start of the week that he wanted to go to the climbing wall. Going to our local indoor rock climbing gym in the dead of winter has been one of our favorite cold-weather activities since the boys first climbed four Januarys ago (click). So, after a week of working his tush off at bedtime, Owen’s goal of a rock-climbing trip came true.
Owen was psyched! As was Meera (who climbed, for real, for the first time ever — at precisely the same age that her brothers first climbed). Turned out that Kyle, however, in a strange twist (he’s usually The Fearless One), was really nervous. The climbing became not just a great Earning Chart reward, but also a great learning experience for all three bambinos. Owen got to feel gratified for earning something for him and his siblings that he had worked very hard for; Meera got a huge self-confidence boost by doing something most 3-year-olds would never attempt (or get the chance) to do; and Kyle got to experience the satisfaction of putting himself out there and conquering a fear. And for us as parents… it was just so great to stand back and watch the three of them climb.
My first big meeting of 2012 was bright and early Thursday morning. I was, as usual, in a rush. Despite my vows to myself to begin the new year being “less rushed,” I was, unfortunately, just as rushed as I was ‘last year’. Any working mom knows the morning craze: trying to get everyone up and out the door for the day (including self), frantically trying to apply mascara while pro-actively working to avoid a toddler tantrum and re-actively shouting “hurry up! we’re not going to be late today!”, screaming to the kids to “brush your teeth!” while screwing on the top of my coffee travel mug and clearing breakfast bowls off the table all at the same time, packing lunch boxes and backpacks and work-bags and everything else. You get the drift; it is just crazy. My meeting was an important one, and with some big-wigs, but casual dress was appropriate, since we are still officially-in-between-semesters. In my mad-rush-to-get-everyone-up-and-out-the-door, I somehow, unbeknownst to me, put two different shoes on my feet. It wasn’t until after the meeting, as I was walking back to my car, that I happened to look down and realize that I had different Danskos on each foot. I just about died. After I swallowed my pride, I laughed at myself, and then took this picture in the parking lot. My kids were all dressed to a ‘T’ that day, but me… as usual… I was lacking in the fully-put-together department. 2012 is off to a great start for this working mom (note: sarcasm).
While many people in the world celebrate January 1st as New Year’s Day, Haitians all over the planet also celebrate January 1st as Haiti’s Independence Day. The tradition is to celebrate the anniversary of Haiti’s becoming the world’s First Black Republic by eating a very special food, Soup Joumou. Soup Joumou is a thick pumpkin/squash based-soup that is delicious. But it is also symbolic. The story is that enslaved Haitians were prohibited, by their slave-owners, from eating Soup Joumou, a traditional favorite food of the Haitian people. After a hard-fought 13-year uprising against their French “masters,” the Haitian people won their own independence back, and celebrated by eating their special soup in the streets and town centers throughout their country. Kyle and Owen were born in 2004, the year of the 200th anniversary of Haiti’s Independence. And for all those 200 years, and through until today, Haitians in Haiti and Haitians throughout the Haitian diaspora, have eaten Soup Joumou on January 1. This year I made Soup Joumou for the first time, and we celebrated Haitian Independence Day like other Haitian-American families do… by filling our bellies with Soup Joumou and talking about the meaning, importance, and symbolism of January 1 for Haitians everywhere. K & O took leftover Soup Joumou to school for lunch this week too, and told their teacher and their friends the story of this very special soup. Happy January 1!
We’ve spent the past two New Year’s Eves with the Slavins in Connecticut. That is a tradition we love and look forward to all year. So when the Slavins decided to head to Australia for the holidays, we were lost as to how to spend our NYE without them, all alone, on the other side of the planet, far far away from our favorite Aussie-American family. How dare they?! (actually, we didn’t blame them one bit, we’d jump right on the plane with them if we could swing it. plus, they have their new baby boy Callan to show off to all of their Australian friends and relatives. and there is the allure of the sunny Australian beach Christmas pulling them over there to the other side of the earth. really, who could blame them?)
Given that we fully expect to spend most every other NYE with the Slavins, we didn’t want to do anything too precedent-setting this year. But we also didn’t want to just let NYE pass us by either. We decided that we would spend New Year’s Eve Day in New York City. And we are so glad we did! NYE in NYC! The last day of the year in The Big Apple!
Our day trip was designed with a mission: to see firsthand the precise place where the ball drops in Times Square on New Year’s Eve.
We parked at our usual place in Hoboken, then took the train the rest of the way in, purposefully planning to get off a few blocks away from Times Square so that we could do some sight-seeing and city-walking. Much to the bambinos’ delight, we took a route that passed right by Macy’s famous holiday window displays. The last time we did the Macy’s holiday windows was 2006, Meera wasn’t born yet, and K & O don’t even remember it. Those windows sort of take your breath away… you can’t help but be just blown away by them. And they seem to get more and more elaborate all the time. Truly amazing.
Along our route we also encountered an awesome street drummer (K & O have always loved this kind of drumming, especially since their 5th Birthday Party). The bambinos rocked out to the drumming, dancing in the street for all the world to see. Soon enough it was not clear who the crowd was watching more– the drummer, or our kids.
Side note: interestingly enough, as we began to walk away a young Asian guy very pointedly asked Kyle and Owen a question. They didn’t seem to understand what he was asking, and I couldn’t hear him over the drumming, so I went closer to try to make out what was going on. He was smiling and looking very friendly asking Kyle and Owen, “Is that drummer your father?” And K & O were looking at him in complete bewilderment, not having any idea how to respond. I quickly cleared it up by saying very clearly, “No! That is not their father! THAT [pointing to Braydon, who was right there with us] is their father!!!” The guy looked stunned and said, “No way!” And I said, “Yes way!” K & O wanted to know what that was all about, and as I explained it to them, we all sort of laughed and shook our heads. (what else are we supposed to do?) The point of this story is not that anything too strange or disturbing occurred (we get this kind of thing all the time, we are used to it), but rather that it even happens right smack dab in the middle of one of the most racially, ethnically, and culturally diverse places on the planet.
Anyhooo… moving on…
A day in NYC just wouldn’t be a day in NYC without hot dogs from a street vendor (or, more accurately, it just wouldn’t be a day in NYC without us buying hotdogs for our kids from a street vendor)~~
Eventually we found it: the place where the New Year’s Eve ball drops in Times Square~~
Times Square is always crazy, but it was even crazier than usual on New Year’s Day. We were shocked by how many people were already staking out their spots for the night, how much police presence there was on the ground, and how intense the energy there was already. We had to keep Meera on Braydon’s shoulders because the crowd was already too thick for her to be able to manage walking. We didn’t stay long, but it was very cool to see the precise location where we’d watch the ball drop on our t.v. later that night!
Next we headed downtown, in pursuit of a dumpling feast at one of our favorite restaurants on earth. And, much to the thrill of the bambinos, we got to ride the subway to Chinatown!!! (For them, the trip to NYC would be worth it just to ride the subway.)
I don’t think we’ve ever brought the bambinos into the city without stopping in at Joe’s Shanghai. They’ve grown up eating there. And they know, full well, it is worth the wait. This time, it was a 40 minute wait. We don’t even bat an eye at that — 40 minutes goes by in a flash when you’re in the middle of Chinatown! So much to see and do.
And then, the dumplings. We ordered 4 steamer-baskets of dumplings this time (we learned from our last visit that 3 was not enough). I cannot describe the eating frenzy that is K & O eating Joe’s Shanghai soup dumplings. They love those things like there is no tomorrow. It is an acquired taste, and Meera is officially acquiring it. After the 4 orders of dumplings were totally devoured (plus our usual string beans and noodles), K & O declared that “next time we need to order 5!” That is a lot of dumplings.
Before we knew it, the day was ending and it was time to head home. Our strategy was to get out of the city before things got too wild. As we were getting off the train in Hoboken to head to our car, we stopped to talk to some cops who were on the street gearing up for a very busy night with their police-dogs. As the bambinos checked out the dogs the cops joked with Braydon and I about how we were making a good move by getting out of there when we were. While it still feels like quite a new era of our lives (heading home for New Year’s Eve), we would not trade it for the world. And while it was definitely humbling on New Year’s Eve to be walking away from the city (literally and figuratively), and going against the crowd (literally and figuratively), there was nothing we would have rather been doing.
5:00 pm, New Year’s Eve 2011, the J-Ms head home~~
And so, we went home, got Meera to bed, played checkers and did mazes, and played a rousing game of ‘HORSE’-basketball in the kitchen. We then spent the last couple hours of 2011 sitting in our family room drinking champagne (and sparkling lemonade) and eating bbq potato chips, and watching the ball drop, live from the very spot we had been earlier that day in Times Square. It was the first time K & O stayed up until midnight on New Year’s Eve. Surely we’ll never be able to get them to sleep before midnight on NYE again.
2012 is going to be a big year for us. Lots on the horizon as we plan to set out on some brand new adventures and embark on new chapters to our story. Happy New Year!
On Sunday Kyle and Owen got to go to a baseball clinic at Lehigh. This 
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