Our next-door-neighbors, Sandy & Charlie, are back from India and they’ve got their newly adopted babies home with them now safe and sound. We were honored to be the first non-family members to welcome the newest American citizens to the U.S.A. I cannot even articulate how big of a deal this is for us. What are the chances that we’d happen to find ourselves living in an upper-middle-class Bucks County Pennsylvania neighborhood in which 5 of the 12 houses are inter-racial families? What are the chances that we’d happen to find ourselves living anywhere in the country and have our next-door-neighbors be an adoptive family that comes pretty darn close to resembling our own? I seriously can’t even explain all of the ways that this is so incredibly great for Kyle and Owen — let alone for Braydon and I. We are so blessed to be in this situation. In so many, many countless ways.
The arrival of Ambika and Nate from their orphanage in India has been much anticipated by our family. I wasn’t sure how it would go, given how attached to Sandy our boys are. Would they be insanely jealous to see Sandy have, and prioritize, her own children? Would the age difference between the kids (Ambika is 4, Nate is 6) bo too huge for them to be able to play well together? Would K & O have a real big problem with not being the sole focus of all of the adult attention (Sandy, Charlie, Braydon, and I hang out in our driveways –between our two houses– a lot, and often our other neighbors, Pat & Amy who have no children, join us)? How do you explain adoption to two-year-olds in a way they can understand? We try all the time, when we talk about their own adoption, but who knows how much of it they are actually comprehending? What do they interpret, for example, when I say “Sweetie pie, Sandy is Ambika and Nate’s mommy now!”?
I honestly do not think that K, O, Ambika, and Nate’s first meeting could possibly have gone any better. At first there was apprehension on all of their parts. But after some Halloween candy was exchanged, and the trucks got rolling, it was as if the four of them had been playmates forever! As a welcome home gift we had given Ambika and Nate each a truck — just like the ones that Owen and Kyle have and play with every day in the driveway. Although they are 4 & 6 years old, they are so tiny because of malnourishment and stunted growth. So, they can fit and ride the trucks just fine. Since K & O are so enormous for their age, the four of them are very comparable in size. (Just as a reference point– K & O currently weigh 38 pounds each; Nate, the 6-year-old, weighs 24 pounds). And since none of them speak English very well (Ambika and Nate spoke no english when Sandy and Charlie first met them at their orphanage 2 weeks ago) everyone is JUST FINE in that realm!!! That’s one of the best things about the whole scenario: They don’t have to talk much or explain much or do much at all — they can all four just be kids. And play. And forget, a bit, about the suffering they have all had in the histories of their short little lives. What’s amazing is to watch them together and see their smiles and realize that they don’t even have any idea how much they all actually have in common. What matters to them right now is basically this: We are four little kids, we have four cool trucks, our driveways slant down-hill so we can ride like the wind, we have mommies and daddies, and our mommies give us all the milk we can drink and all the snacks we can eat… truly: it doesn’t get much better than that. Especially when you have known otherwise.
Here are some photos of the big day: the day the four kids met for the first time! (click here and here and here)