While in Maine for Stina’s wedding, we stayed at the VRBO home of the Bazyk’s — good old friends of ours from back in our Boston days. Their vacation home — a very rustic, very isolated log cabin in the woods — is only about 20 minutes from my sister’s house, so it worked out perfectly. We had never been to the Bazyk’s “Maine House” before, but had heard a lot about it. And it definitely lived up to all of the stories we had heard! I must say, never in my life have I slept in such a remote location (and that is coming from a girl who grew up in rural New Hampshire!)— we were almost entirely cut off from the rest of the world– and truly in the backwoods of Maine. The cabin is right on the edge of a small pond– Papoose Pond. There was not another human being within eyesight or earshot. The fact that there was no internet, no cell reception, no phone service (except for local calls), no t.v., etc…. made it quite an adventure unto itself, and a very good break from reality for Braydon and I. We were there by ourselves the first night, and then for the rest of our time my parents and Sadie stayed with us there. The kids had a blast sleeping in bunk beds, exploring the cabin and the woods, canoeing and kayaking, hunting for bull frogs, and picking flowers from lily pads. The drives to-and-from the wedding events were stunning in places (especially all of the beautiful Maine lakes and fields). And the kids were up so late every night that they got to see the dark, dark nights with the bright, bright moon on the very still pond under incredibly starry skies. A highlight was when a loon popped up just a couple of feet from Kyle’s kayak one day– and then popped back under and swam underneath his kayak. Another highlight was that our first morning there we awoke to moose tracks in the sand at the edge of the pond! (as always, click on any photo to enlarge)
It was a 10.5 hour drive to Maine for Auntie Stina’s Wedding. Things did not go as planned that day and we ended up leaving much later in the morning than we had anticipated. [Long story, but the night before we had all three kids at the 24-Hour Urgent Care clinic; all three diagnosed with staph infections (CA-MRSA… for anyone who knows about this stuff, you know it is nasty!!!); prescribed 10-day rounds of antibiotics for which it took 3 different pharmacies in order to find enough of the antibiotic to fill all three prescriptions; no child got to bed before 10:30pm that night and both parents were completely spent (on top of everything else, Braydon had spent all day in Delaware that day for a venture capital conference); and, so, unfortunately, the final packing for the trip didn’t get done until the next morning.] Anyway… it was a long drive that day. Toward the end, when things were getting really hairy, we ended up spontaneously making the decision to pull over for a couple of hours on the Maine Coast for some R&R before attempting the last 2-hour-long leg of the drive. It was around 5pm when we found our way to the beach– the magic hour. The light was gorgeous, there were hardly any other people within sight, and that time at the ocean turned out to be a really magical wonderful couple of hours for our family.
Summer 2010 — Go To A Waterpark — CHECK!
We spent today with four other families at the Land of Make Believe — an amusement park and water park in Hope, New Jersey– about an hour away from our house. It was an incredibly fun day trip to celebrate K & O’s “bestest twin friends” Lloyd and Lydia’s 6th birthday. This was our first time at Land of Make Believe, and our first time ever as a family to a full-fledged water park. This (in particular, the water park part) was a dream come true for the boys– something they’ve been wanting to do for a long time now– and something that was right at the top of our Summer 2010 Family To Do List. So, tonight, another big ‘ole CHECK! off the list. What a great, great day! The boys were in their glory. And Meera was too! Despite not napping, she stuck out the whole day like a trooper. She’s shaping up to be almost as wild-and-crazy as her brothers (God help us!!!). Her favorite part of the day, no doubt, was riding the roller-coaster (more than once). One thing that makes Land of Make Believe so great is that there are many, many rides built especially for little ones. Meera got to ride many of them and had an absolute blast. Her mantra of the day was “Me go too! Me go too!!!” The boys’ favorite ride was the “airplane ride.” Owen especially liked acting as Pilot for him and his very good friend Wil (long time blog readers might remember him– we’ve posted about our boys’ special friendship with Wil a few times, for example, here). But really, K & O loved every single second of every single ride (and believe me, they rode them all). The highlight, though, was the water park. Somehow I shouldn’t still be surprised by these things, but I have to admit that I still am: at age barely six K & O went on every single water slide (except for just one for which they didn’t reach the minimum height) and absolutely LOVED every single adrenaline-pumping, heart-thumping, free-falling one. Don’t get me wrong, they loved the lazy river too. But, seriously, these boys are not usual for their age. No other kid in our group, except for one 11 year old boy, dared go on any of the extreme waterslides. But K & O were riding them all… and loving it… and then, at the end of the day, when there were barely any lines left, they were riding them over-and-over-and-over-again. Luckily for them they have a real winner for a Papi. Braydon went over and over with the boys on every single slide, full-on-enthusiasm the whole time, and loving it almost as much as K & O. Meera wasn’t tall enough for the waterslides, but she had loads and loads of fun in the wading pool (which is, apparently, the largest wading pool in the United States?) and all the toddler slides. We were there when the park opened at 9:45am, and we closed the place at 5:45. Milkshakes for dinner on the drive home. And then, straight to bath and bed for three exhausted bambinos. What a day!!!!!!!!!!!! This summer is good. Very, very good!
Will catch up with blogging soon. In the meantime… this is just a not-so-great-snapshot taken with our old camera, but I love it. Summer breakfasts are so much better than school-year-breakfasts. Leisurely and lovely– and sometimes even at “Richard’s Counter” (our name for our big kitchen counter– custom built for us by our neighbor Richard a few years ago– and since then always been called “Richard’s Counter”). Pancakes three different ways– chocolate chip for Owen, Blueberry for Kyle, and Plain Jane for Meera. Real syrup for O and M (the real deal from maple trees New Hampshire liquid gold). Fake syrup (‘Log Cabin’ or whatever) for Kyle. Orange Juice all around. K & O are still in their pjs. Meera is already in her princess ballerina bathing suit with a bow in her hair (upon waking up in the morning she always immediately insists on “getting dressed”). And my favorite part of this picture…. all three of them have their loveys… of course. With Owen– Lovey Lion and Lovey Lion’s Twin Brother. With Kyle– Honey Bunny and Honey Bunny’s Twin Brother. And with Meera– Bunny.
Braydon and Meera at the Maine Coast, Thursday June 17, 2010
A belated Happy Father’s Day to my true love and soul mate, Braydon!
Father’s Day was more than a little overshadowed this year.
(We’ll have to make up for that next year.)
We are just back from a special trip! A trip to Maine for Auntie Stina’s wedding!!!
I was the official photographer, and I have 953 photos to sort through, and we and our bambinos have lots (and lots!) of sleep to catch up on— thus– blogging will be sparse in the next few days. But, we are back. And, suffice it to say, it was quite an amazing time for the J-Ms!
…more to come…
My New Favorite Picture Ever
“Nature hike to see a waterfall.” CHECK.
this probably would have been my new favorite picture ever, if it hadn't turned out blurry. oh well. I still love it.
Today we took it upon ourselves to be able to check off one of the items on our Summer 2010 Family Fun To Do List. And the end result was way better than simply a check mark– we had an awesome Summer Sunday. A very fun, very cool, very adventurous, very memorable summer day trip was had by all of us five J-Ms. We spent the day in Jim Thorpe, PA. After a fun lunch in town we spent the rest of the day at Lehigh Gorge State Park. We did a serious hike (like, probably way too serious for 2 six year olds and a 2 year old in a backpack that she’s right on the verge of growing out of) to Glen Onoko Falls. The boys are completely amazing hikers and we could probably do just about anything with them (anything that we ourselves could do, anyway). But with Meera along we’re pretty severely limited– she is not digging the backpack too much these days (although today we forced her to stay in it for the entire hike despite some periods of protest from her), and she’s just way too little to actually hike anything much at all beyond a simple walking path. Today, though, it all magically came together for us and worked out. She never napped the entire day (unheard of!), and still she was relatively cooperative (or at least tolerant) of the backpacking part of the excursion. Braydon deserves the real medal, though, for doing a very serious (and at times, quite dangerous!) hike with a 27-pound baby on his back! The pay-off was huge though— we got to experience an awesome (truly exhilarating!) hike, see very beautiful waterfalls, and then — at the end — hang out for a couple of hours along the shore of a beautiful river. We headed back into Jim Thorpe for ice cream. And then came home for pizza, baths, and bed. Really, we can’t think of much better than this day for our family on a Sunday in Summer.
re·flect
/rɪˈflɛkt/
–verb (used with object)
to cast back; to think, ponder, consider, or meditate; ruminate, deliberate, contemplate.
*
Never be afraid to sit awhile and think.
~Lorraine Hansberry, A Raisin in the Sun
the morning after returning home from the Dominican Republic; K & O play airplanes/airport/"we're flying to Hispaniola"
Many people believe that traveling with young children is a “waste.” They say that elaborate vacations or substantive trips and travels are simply “lost” on younger kids. That we should “wait until they are older” so that they will “appreciate” it, or, “at least remember it.” Braydon and I know that lots of people think this, and we have had people say these things directly to us. Braydon and I, obviously, disagree. Right from the start we have always traveled as much as possible with our children. We have conscientiously prioritized travel — both financially and in terms of our time — in a major way. We try to make our trips as often and as substantive as we possibly can. If we could, we would do even more. And while we know that our kids probably won’t remember much of the details (if any), and that they probably can’t appreciate well (if at all) how truly privileged they are to have the life experiences that they do, we are sure that their world views are being shaped by the bigness of the world to which they are being exposed.
A few years ago I asked a good friend what parenting advice she could give me. I ask this question of many people I come into contact with– it is my favorite question to ask of people– but this particular person said something that really stuck with me. She is a friend who is many years older and wiser than me; a single mom whose mothering I deeply respect; someone whose bi-racial, bi-lingual, bi-cultural, bi-continental daughter we’ve known since she was quite young and is now a young woman that I’d be proud to be the parent of. Anyway, our friend told me that her best parenting advice was this: “Travel with your kids so they grow up knowing they are part of the big world.” That’s the direct quote. I’ll never forget that. And I try to remember it in the face of naysayers who tell me (or insinuate) that “traveling with young kids is a waste.”
Since we’ve been back from the Dominican Republic, Kyle and Owen have been doing what they always do when we return from a trip: they are reflecting on it. In their own ways. Mostly we see this in their play and their questions. Every trip expands their world exponentially. And when they are grounded, safely back home again, back into the rhythm and routine of their own daily life, they explore their new-found expansion and reflect on the new that they have seen. They process it in part by talking about it, but mostly by playing it. The woods are now a tropical jungle. The pool is the Caribbean Sea. And the sandbox is now a favorite dinner spot on the beach in La Romana, Dominican Republic, on the island of Hispaniola.
the Jungle Restaurant, our favorite at the resort where we stayed in the DR, is re-created in the sandbox; table, chairs, play dishes, and an old umbrella were pulled out from the shed and set up on the sand; K & O were the chefs and servers for hours and hours and hours for many days after returning home from our trip
I have a hard time getting K & O to draw. They resist it and always have. And they are really (relatively speaking– for their age) bad at it. I say that with all due respect (and I’d never, ever, ever tell them or imply to them that they are “bad” at it). But seriously, drawing is not their strong suit. (and even on a recent ‘IQ’-type test that they took they were in the bottom 5th percentile in the area of drawing). This is ironic because I am actually quite a crafty-artistic-type and have always encouraged them to draw (while carefully not pushing them to draw). But it is also ironic for another reason– since long before I ever had kids, I have been intensely interested in children’s artwork as an expression of the perspectives and vantage points of youth. This is actually something with which I’ve done quite a bit of academic work, and something I’m sort of ‘known for’ in one corner my professional life. Strange how ironic life can be– that I can do all sorts of work on children’s artwork as a qualitative methodology for the sociology of children and childhood… and then, years later… my own children pretty much won’t draw! (we just have to laugh!)… anyway… despite all this… every once in a while K & O do draw. And, usually, when they do draw (if it is for real and not just scribbling for the sake of scribbling), what they do is enough food-for-thought to last me quite a while. A few days after coming home from the Dominican Republic, the boys actually sat down at the kitchen table with me to draw. Here is what Owen drew:
Owen's drawing
Owen explained it (from left to right), in his own words~~~~ The bright hot sun; a palm tree with coconuts growing on it; a flag sticking up– it is the Haiti flag and the United States flag and actually a whole Hispaniola and America flag; a map of the hotel which is actually also a dot-to-dot maze; Kyle and Papi and Owen and Mommy on vacation.
And Kyle drew this:
Kyle's drawing
Kyle’s drawing in intense. He spent a lot of time working on it. It has been floating in my head since. The entire time he was talking, telling me all about what he was drawing. Kyle’s drawing, in his own words~~~~ the clinic where we [K & O] were born in Cite Soleil in the city of Port au Prince in the country of Haiti on the island of Hispaniola [on far right, the oval with lots of people inside it]; this clinic is far, far away from the United States and it is full of people– it is like a little hospital– and the people are all in the clinic and Kyle and Owen are being born in there– and we are born in our birthmother’s belly– and our birthmother is in the clinic too; [drawn under the clinic] Rock and Patrick coming to the clinic to get us; [leading off to the left] the road in Haiti; [further to the left] Mommy and Papi coming to get us and lots and lots of people all around in the streets in Haiti; [far left] the airplane that Mommy and Papi took to Haiti– with a line (the plane’s exhaust fumes) all behind it going all the way back to the United States; [center] a big huge palm tree with coconuts hanging down and also the special bark that you can climb; the sun. What is, probably, most interesting to me is that when he had finished the whole drawing he handed me the paper and said it was a drawing of “Vacation.”
About two weeks after we got home from the DR, Braydon was out with the boys running an errand. They were listening to music and quiet. Out of the blue, from the back seat, Kyle said, “Papi, did you know that I wish I was born in Mommy’s belly?” Braydon told me later that day that Kyle had said this. A couple of days later, when I found a good mundane moment alone with Kyle in the kitchen, I snuggled up to him and with him sitting up on the counter, and me standing close, with my arms wrapped around him, I whispered in his ear, “Kyle, you know what? I love you exactly just as you are, and I wish that I could have had you born from my belly.” Instantaneously he melted into my arms, his head heavy on my shoulder. He pulled away so that his face was just a couple of inches from mine, “Really?” He asked. “Yes, really,” I said, “I am so glad it all happened like it did, but still, I wish you had been born in my belly so that I could have had you and Owen with me the whole whole whole time.” “It’s ok Mommy!” he said cheerily. “I wish we were born in your belly too! But if I wasn’t born in my birthmother’s belly then I wouldn’t be brown! And you wouldn’t have been able to come to Haiti!” “I know!” I said, following his lead, “and I love your brown skin! and that was the best day of my life! So I wish you were born in my belly, but I’m also so glad it all happened the way it did.” That was the end of it, for then. But it did what I hoped for– it freed him to express something– because about every-other-day since then, at totally random times (last night, for example, it was when Kyle was sitting on the potty looking at a Red Sox magazine and I was chaperoning Meera nearby in the bathtub), Kyle says to me, totally out of the blue, “Mommy, I wish I was born in your belly.” And I just stop for a second and look at him and say, “I know baby, me too.” And this is a newfound place for us– an expression of something that has surely always been there, but it took a trip to their island of Hispaniola to bring us to this new place of reciprocal expression and understanding.
Each place is beautiful in its own way. And some trips are more elaborate, more long-distance, more involved, than others. But each of them bring us to someplace new. Not just in the actual trip, but in the reflection of it.
9:17 a.m., Owen Takes Meera For A Spin
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