BAMBINOS

Meera had a fabulous first week of her 6-year-old summer. She loved art camp! Upon getting home from her final day yesterday afternoon, she did an “Art Show” for Kyle, Owen, and me. We had to sit through 20 minutes of detailed lecture/performance/explanation of her (many) pieces from the week. She produced a plethora of art!

These two had an incredibly sport-filled week — the first week of their 10-year-old summer. Each day: 7 hours of intense basketball, a 1-hour-break for a quick shower and to refuel (food), then 2-3 hours of baseball practice for the All-Star Team. Whoa. It was a lot, even for these sports fanatics. But they survived and thrived. Basketball camp ended early yesterday afternoon, so they had a couple of extra hours to unwind before going to baseball (photo above). Their team lost their first All-Star game last night, but all is well. Oh, and as predicted, they consumed a ridiculous amount of food this week!

This one is for all the academics (especially female grad students) out there—

Dear friends from the academy,

Summer is often thought of as the “cram time” for academics’ “real work” (i.e. scholarship/publishing). Without the distraction of teaching and service, we — at least theoretically — are supposed to be able to focus fully on our research and writing.

Ok, seriously? Whoever had that idea was not a mother.

Summer was not designed for a “Mama PhD” to be working. Lucky for me, I have two weeks of my kids in camp. I need to cram as much as I humanly can into these two weeks. Because after that I intend to take full advantage of tenure for the month of July. And I refuse to feel guilty about that. Because I worked more than enough 18-hour days in the past 9 months to make up for it.

That’s the flip side: for all the politics and the publish-or-perish pressure, we also have tenure which gives us unparalleled freedom and flexibility. So, I will not complain.

But I will say this: if you happen to be writing your first book right now, or anytime soon, try to keep in mind something that nobody ever alerted me to (and something that never, ever even crossed my mind when I was writing mine) — mentally prepare yourself that you might just have to go back to it someday. If you are fortunate enough to get asked to do a second edition, you’ll have the terrible misfortune of actually have to revise your book… yet again. Oh dear God, please help me through the next two weeks!

Much love from your friend in the struggle,

hbj

The South Side Bandits, ready to play.

We’ve been in Little League post-season play-offs these past couple of weeks. K & O’s team — the South Side Bandits — won the district championship last year for the 9-10 year old division. And thus, they had high hopes for this year. They made it all the way to last night — the final championship game. It came down to South Side (Bethlehem) vs. Mountainville (Allentown). If you’re from anywhere around here, or are even familiar with the scene in the Lehigh Valley, then you know that’s a big deal: Bethlehem vs. Allentown in a Little League Championship is no small thing. It was a nail-biter of a game. The president of the district had hired a special “neutral ump” just for the occassion — and both sides (parents/fans) were urged to keep themselves contained (the two sides’ fan bases don’t have a very good history of being able to keep a lid on it). Tensions were running high, and there were some intense moments on and off the field. In the end, Mountainville won. But South Side came out standing tall and we were very proud of our boys.

Little League is one area of life in which Braydon and I do not take pictures. This are a couple of reasons for that. For one thing, we’re so wrapped up in the actual experience that we don’t have time for photos (we really do love watching the boys play! and it is easy to get very enmeshed in it). But it is mostly because within the culture that is our life during baseball season it would be very awkward, and would actually feel totally inappropriate, to pull out our big expensive camera and start photographing. At South Side Little League folks just aren’t whipping out Nikons. In fact, they aren’t taking pictures, with anything, of anything, at all, ever. So it would just seem wrong for us — of all people — to do it. Even after two years of full immersion in the life of South Side Little League, we are foreigners in a foreign land, and outsiders within. As a result, we have very few pictures, and all of the pictures that we do have are snapshots with our iPhones.

Despite that, a few of our iPhone snapshots seem to capture — for me — much of the essence of our baseball life. It is impossible for me to know if these pictures are evocative and representative to just us, or if they would be to the outside world as well (do they only paint the picture for me because I know the landscape? or do they speak to others too?). Here are the few that we have ~

above: First practice of the season. The season starts early for South Side — basically, as soon as the snow melts. Games begin in April, and there are usually 2 per week (sometimes 3). Away games are within a 30-minute radius of South Bethlehem. As long as it isn’t pouring rain, or heavy snow, there is practice, usually 3-4 times per week — 5:00-8:00ish (or when it is too dark to see) on weeknights, and sometimes Saturday mornings too. Throughout the entire spring and early summer we need to keep our calendar free for weeknights 5-8pm, and all day Saturday. You never know when there will (or will not) be practice, so you have to always be prepared for there to be practice. This schedule is a huge challenge to our family — actually, for our particular family this is probably the biggest challenge of all for us regarding baseball season. As a dual-career couple it is almost impossible to keep up with it, and it requires a ridiculous amount of planning and coordination.

above: Post-game, at the Mountainville snack stand. There is a standing tradition that when Allentown and Bethlehem play each other in a big game, the home team gives the opposing team’s players free hotdogs after the game.

above: South Side Little League Opening Ceremonies 2014. Try-outs are intense, and then most of the teams (definitely beginning with the 9-10 year old age group) do cuts in the first few weeks of practice to weed out the weaker players (they are sent down to the younger teams, not cut out entirely). It is very cut throat, and this was completely shocking to me when we first started. Opening Ceremonies are held only once the teams are totally established and uniforms have been given out. Most of the coaches played for these same teams when they were kids. And many of their fathers and friends’ fathers (and/or uncles and cousins) coached them. It is all kept “in house” and is a very tight knit community. In the photo above you can see the home fields of South Side Little League (the ceremony was held on the 9-10 & 11-12 field; there is also a smaller field for the younger players and a larger field for the older players). You can see the train (tracks) running along the perimeter, and if you look closely you can see the road/highway just on the edge. South Side is completely self-sufficient and maintains it’s own fields. South Side folks often talk about the inequality of baseball-field-maintenance in the area — they are 100% convinced that the surrounding towns/neighborhoods receive better funding and better services for the maintenance of their fields and programs. I have not done the research to know for sure what is going on with that. But I have no reason to suspect that the South Side folks aren’t 100% correct.

above: Kyle at bat, at the home field.

above: Owen at bat, at an opponent’s field.

above: The chalkboard outside the snack stand announces the one and only fundraiser of the season. Braydon and I are consistently shocked by how little fundraising is done, and by how few local businesses and organizations financially support South Side Little League. We have spent many hours hearing the history of why this is. The story seems to have many different versions as told by many different people. The bottom line is that South Side Little League has an extremely limited operating budget and is running on a shoestring (to say the least).

above: A highlight of Kyle’s season — during this game he hit a big home run, and then, in another inning, another home run — with the bases loaded (his first grand slam ever). Braydon snapped the photo as Kyle was coming into the dugout after the grand slam.

above: A highlight of Owen’s season — this was just last night, in the final championship game. Owen’s been used as the closing pitcher for the past several games. This photo was taken during his first inning pitching — we were losing and the goal was to try to hold them. He pitched a 1-2-3 inning — striking out the first three batters up, all in a row. Despite the fact that South Side ended up losing, that inning was a high of the game for the team (and the fans!), and definitely a personal high for Owen.

above: Meera, God love her, has to sit through all of this. Baseball games are “soooo loooong,” and “soooo booooring” (her words) for most of the little sisters, and many of them are sitting through hours and hours of practices on top of the games (at South Side Little League nobody ever drops off their kid; it is fully expected that family members — and preferably the entire family — will be present for all practices and all games throughout the entire season). This all adds up to many hours, many nights a week, all spring long, for all involved. Poor Meera! One of the rewards is that we always say “yes” when the ice cream truck pulls in. And if she happens to be playing with other littles at the moment, then we spring for them too.

above: Owen eats a pastelillo from the snack stand before a game (it cracks me up that he holds his gum in his other hand, which he’ll pop back in when he’s done with his snack). Like all the other teams’ snack stands, the South Side snack stand has hotdogs, potato chips, sunflower seeds, etc. But for special games they sometimes have “the good stuff” too: fresh, from-scratch, homemade tacos (oh my gosh! the best tacos you’ll ever eat!) — or, like at Saturday’s game — pastelillos (the Puerto Rican version of empanadas/pastelitos, stuffed with spicy ground beef) and canoas de platanos maduros (sweet fried plantains stuffed with meat and cheese). We love it all.

above: The Bandits’ gear. Each player brings their own glove and bat (if they have one; sometimes they share bats if all the kids don’t have their own). But the four batting helmets are shared amongst them. The kids’ gloves and bats are valued possessions and are treated as such. I really love and appreciate how the coaches and kids carefully line up the bats and helmets in the dugout before each game, and keep them that way throughout. The equipment is valued and treated with care from the top-down. This is in contrast to our previous experience, with Upper Bucks Little League (K & O played for Durham before we moved to campus), which was a very affluent, very white area. In Durham Little League every player had to have his own glove and bat, but also his own batting helmet, and most had multiple bats and many other baseball accessories. The equipment was usually strewn about and few (if any) players or coaches took care to keep any of it tidy.

above: The Team Photo. Top = 2013, Bottom = 2014. The head coach took these with his phone camera, and doctored them up with the ‘frame,’ proudly texting this to the parents. Whereas lots of teams have professional team photos taken each year, we have this — and honest to God, it is my opinion: this is way, way better.

* * * * *

South Side Little League is, for us, a full immersion experience. It is a world that we’d never have access to if it weren’t for our boys’ love of baseball. I’m also pretty sure that we would not have access to it if our boys weren’t so good at baseball.

For those who aren’t familiar, Bethlehem is like so many cities in the United States: totally segregated by race and class. The “North Side” (literally, on the north side of the Lehigh River) is relatively wealthy and white. The “South Side” is relatively poor and brown. And, like many college towns, this is all complicated by the fact that Lehigh University sits smack in the middle of South Side. There is a long, troubling history of “town-gown” relationship problems between the university and the community in which it is located. Today, most Lehigh faculty live in North Bethlehem or further out in the sprawling suburbs of the area. Very few faculty live in South Bethlehem (I could probably count them on one hand), and none of them currently have school-aged kids. The South Bethlehem public schools are known to serve predominantly poor and Hispanic kids, and are also known to be — like so many urban public schools — underfunded, under-resourced, and under-served.

Technically, because we live on Lehigh’s campus, our residential address zip code is 18015 — South Side Bethlehem. Despite the fact that this is the neighborhood in which we reside, we enter what is, for us, a completely foreign world when we enter the world of South Side Little League. There are about 80 boys who play for South Side. Most of them are 3rd generation South Side boys; their fathers and grandfathers played for South Side too. As far as I can tell, we are the only non-Hispanic family; the only non ESL family; K & O are the only black non-Hispanic boys; Meera, Braydon, and I are the only white parents/sibling.

Most (probably all) of the families are low-income, and I’m sure many of them are technically well below the poverty line. Spanish is spoken in the home for most. Most parents hold relatively low levels of education and work in low-paying (or minimum wage) occupations. Some of them work for Lehigh (a major employer in South Bethlehem) doing groundskeeping and janitorial services.

At South Side, our family sticks out like a sore thumb, both socio-econoically and racially. But once it was known how Kyle and Owen could contribute, we were welcomed (tentatively at first, and then warmly over time) into the community that has become our community too during baseball season. I’m convinced that it is only because of what Kyle and Owen offer (great athleticism) that we are able to “pass” over the line that is race-and-class in order to be able to enter the world that is South Side Little League.

A majority of the South Side Little League families are Puerto Rican. Baseball is big for them. And Little League is hardcore. These families are serious about their baseball; boys start playing pitch-and-catch with their fathers very young; they start t-ball at age 3 or 4; and they play baseball year-round in the yards and streets of their neighborhoods. For many South Side families, baseball isn’t just a love and it isn’t just a major part of their culture, it is also seen as the ticket out for their sons. While they place a big emphasis on education for their daughters, these families place a huge emphasis on baseball for their sons. (Interestingly, South Side has no softball for girls and baseball is, for them, considered an entirely male sport.) I’ve had many South Side parents tell me of their dreams for their sons — dreams of making it to college on a baseball scholarship, or —even better— making it to the MLB. They speak with complete seriousness of their visions of their sons buying them a house someday, buying them a nice car, and “taking care of them” in the future. So, baseball is not just fun and games for these families and their boys. It is an investment — maybe their biggest investment — an investment of money, energy, and a huge amount of time — in their sons and in the future.

Because of all this, a good portion of these families’ year revolves around the boys’ practices and games. During baseball season everything else seems to be secondary. I’ve heard many times of moms skipping baby showers or even weddings in order to not miss their son’s baseball game. Dads plan their work schedules around the baseball schedule. Extended family regularly come out for the games. People are committed. Taking it seriously and being committed are very important. Parents (or kids) who aren’t taking it seriously enough, or who appear to not be committed enough, are frowned upon, gossiped about, and — ultimately, at times — pushed out. South Side Little League is not for the faint of heart.

The coaches are entirely volunteer. And what they do astounds me. I have been observing the Bandits coaches (there is one head coach and two assistant coaches) for two years now, and I am truly in awe. It isn’t just the hours they put in (which are countless), but it is also the devotion that they have to the sport, to the organization, and to each and every player, that amaze me. Many of the kids are from rough homes, many of the coaches have rough histories, and baseball season is rough in and of itself. The coaches are tough. But it is a hardcore form of tough love. To see these coaches devote themselves so fully to these kids — for no other reason but their own passion for the sport and the cause — is just truly unbelievable. Some of the kids have no dad in the picture, some are on really rocky roads with the dads they do have, and all of them need strong male role models (our boys included). The coaches take this entirely seriously. And they tow the line every day of the season. Even after two years of seeing it firsthand, I am still constantly trying to wrap my mind around it.

Our experience with South Side Little League has been unbelievably interesting to me. As a sociologist, I’ve felt from the start of it that I’m in some sort of strange surreal state which is hard to describe. On one hand, I feel like “just one of the moms” (I spend a lot of time talking with the other moms about the stuff that most moms talk about together: what to have for dinner, problems we’re having with our kids, news and stories from our days, etc.). On the other hand, I am most definitely not an insider in this world. I often feel like I’m doing field work — some sort of participant observation or deep ethnography. Over and over in subtle and not-so-subtle ways I’m reminded that I am not “really” a South Sider — I am a professor at Lehigh; I can’t speak Spanish fluently with them (they often break into Spanish when things get heated, or intense, or when they just don’t want to include me); I am white; and I did not grow up there. I’m an outsider.

But when it comes to the actual day-to-day of baseball season, what seems to matter most is simply who’s kid is up to bat, how many outs there are, and what inning we’re in. I cheer for every player and in return I delight in hearing the cheers for Kyle and Owen (who the South Side seem to absolutely adore). At the end of the game, and at the end of the season, we are a whole community who have sat together in the stands all season long. We’ve shared blankets in the frigid cold, we’ve shared umbrellas in the rain, we’ve shared ice and water sweating together in the heat. We’ve shared stories, we’ve shared heartaches, we’ve shared great moments of joy and delight in seeing each other’s kids hit great hits and make great plays. We’ve shared our younger kids’ snacks and toys with each other. And we’ve shared several months of day-in-day-out baseball. It is the real deal: we are forever bonded. I’ve got their back; they’ve got mine. This is the salt of the earth. There is not much better.

It has been hard for me over the past two years to figure out how to write about our experience with South Side Little League. I don’t want to over-expose what it is, or exploit it in any way. At the same time, I don’t want to gloss over it either. It has become a big part of our family identity, and it is an important part of who we are. In some ways, it would be almost easier if I was doing an ethnography on it— that would almost make our participation seem more logical and understandable to everyone involved. But, the thing is, I’m not. I’m just a mom of two of the players.

Kyle and Owen have been getting quite an education in baseball. They’ve become much better players (and they’ve also learned a lot of curse words in Spanish!). South Side Little League has given them a great baseball experience, and has taught them many life lessons— only a fraction of which are actually about baseball. And, perhaps most important, our whole family has been given the privilege of the full immersion experience that is South Side Little League. All five Johnson-McCormicks are different (better) people because of it.

above: A plate of amazing Puerto Rican food at a South Side Little League picnic.

above: My favorite little dude at South Side Little League. When the season started he was only a couple of weeks old. I’ve spent many hours holding this little man this spring. I will so miss him when Little League season is over (note: for the kids who are invited to join the district All-Star Team, which — for better or for worse, includes us — we now go into All-Star post-season play…. it feels like it will never end!).

Today marks Day 1 of Week 1 of Summer 2014. We are super excited — we have a most exciting summer planned!

This week is basketball camp for K&O. and art camp for M. Photo above is the bambinos this morning, right before they got in the car to go to their prospective camps. They chose their outfits very carefully this morning. I get a big kick out of what they choose to wear!

This will be Meera’s first time going to a summer day camp. She was giddy with excitement about going to art camp — all morning is “mask making,” and all afternoon is “painting and drawing.” I had coordinated this with the some of her friends’ parents, so that Meera and 3 of her best friends will be at the camp together this week. This is her idea of heavenly.

This is Kyle and Owen’s fourth year of going to Lehigh’s basketball camp — i.e., “Heaven on Earth” (their words). This is probably their favorite week of the year. I know from prior experience that they will eat more in this week than in any other week of the entire year. Like, exponentially more. So, upon dropping them off this morning, I went straight to the grocery store to prepare myself for what is to come in the next five days.

Just for the record, I want to note a few of the purchases I made — I think (hope?!) that someday I will look back and laugh at this (because right now our grocery bills are hardly a laughing matter… particularly the bill this week!). 2 bunches bananas; 2 dozen eggs; 2 gallons milk, a 24-pack of frozen waffles; gobs and gobs and gobs of fruit and veggies; 3 pounds of cold cuts from the deli (turkey, roast beef, salami); a ridiculous amount of cheese (including a 2 pound block of extra sharp cheddar); 2 boxes of pasta; 8 hamburger patties; 2 packages of hot dogs; 2 pounds chicken breast; 2 pounds of tortellini; 2 bags tortilla chips; 1 dozen assorted greek yogurts; a crazy number of boxes of mac-n-cheese; 2 packages chicken nuggets; 2 boxes of cereal; I could go on and on and on…. Oh, and did I mention?— Meera will eat very little of this; we will eat out for dinner at least two nights this week (due to baseball games); oh… and…. did I also mention?—lunch is provided at basketball camp. Heaven help me.

above ~ May 28, 2008, 10:43pm. St. Luke’s Hospital, Bethlehem, PA. Meera’s Birth.

below ~ February 3, 2005, 5:00pm. Hotel Montana, Port au Prince, Haiti. The Eve of Our Homecoming with Owen and Kyle.

The two best experiences of my life: 1) adopting Kyle and Owen [our meeting them, the orphanage, and the week in Haiti to finish their adoption and get them home], and 2) giving birth to Meera [a 26-hour-Pitocin-induced-labor that ended in an emergency c-section — read Meera’s birth story here]. Both of these Top Two Experiences were only possible because of the unified power of me and my life-partner, my soul-mate, my co-parent, my best-friend, my Braydon. It was through those two experiences that I saw the core of who he is. And trust me: it is a good, good, solid, solid core. The best core I know. This guy is the rich center of my very rich life. Happy Father’s Day Braydon!

above ~ Today, Father’s Day 2014, 7:38pm. A gorgeous June evening on campus at Lehigh University; we’re the only ones around (students are gone for the summer), and it is as if we are living in our own beautiful vast deserted park; we’re just home from the movie Malificent— which we LOVED!— during which Meera and Braydon talked, analyzing every detail of her #1 most favorite story, through the entire movie; before the movie we had Braydon’s choice — Thai food lunch outside, with his favorite Thai lychee tea — where we relished in the delight of watching our twin boys eat tofu summer rolls wrapped with rice paper and dipped in peanut sauce, potstickers with thai chili sauce, chicken satay, pad thai, and red curry; we’re dog-sitting Ryan’s dog this weekend and he’s catching bubbles from Meera; Owen is about to ride his bike down a set of stairs; we’re having a glass of wine; enjoying a moment sitting together in Adirondack chairs absorbing this rich life that we’ve created. Thank you Braydon ~ for all that you do to keep our axis spinning.

Today Dash turned 1 year old! He got to have a long walk in the woods with me this morning (which is his absolute favorite thing in the world to do), a little bit of leftover bacon and sausage from the kids’ breakfast, and tonight he had vanilla custard from Rita’s (brought home to him after Kyle and Owen’s baseball game). He was a happy pup today! (Owen announced that as of today we now need to call him “pup” not “puppy.”) He is such a happy pup everyday! We so lucked out with this dog!

Dash has brought so much joy and love and groundedness to our family. But especially to me. He is most definitely “my” dog — totally bonded with me — which was really unexpected, but which has also been very welcomed. He helps to lighten and brighten my days; he keeps me company; and he keeps me on my toes. Just when my youngest went off to kindergarten, this pup entered our scene and became my closest companion in the day-to-day-of-the-daily-grind. I never expected I’d fall so head-over-heels for a puppy! But I did for Dash.

Happy Birthday to our little fluffernutter!

{homework toward the beginning of the year: I’m there on the other side of the counter, focused, and with a large coffee!}

Tomorrow is the last day of school. The end of 3rd grade and kindergarten for us. And it isn’t even a real last day, because it is only a half-day, and it is only “closing ceremonies.” I often feel quite melancholy about the bambinos’ last day of school, but not this year. This year, I am feeling nothing but happy giddy excitement about it. We are ending this year on a high note, we’re all feeling awesome about how this school year went, and we’re all looking forward to an adventure-filled summer.

And… importantly… this was our first year of serious, hard-core, real homework. And I could not be happier about taking a nice long break from that for awhile. Holy cow, I don’t know how people who homeschool do it. I just know I could never do it. Homework (i.e., our kids’ homework) doesn’t come easily for me. And homework (i.e., their own homework) doesn’t come easily for the bambinos (sitting still at home doing anything doesn’t come easily for Kyle and Owen, and Meera would much prefer to just play play play play play — if it were up to her she’d never do any school work).

But we made it through together. And, as much as I hate homework (and actually, philosophically oppose it for kids younger than high school; seriously), I do have to admit that it was quite the bonding experience for us. It came with the package of our new school, and it was something we knew we’d have to get on board with when we signed on. Especially for Kyle and Owen, homework this year was symbolic of the transition to a new, much more academically rigorous, much more serious and intense academic environment. This is what they wanted — they wanted a school like that. And they got it. Homework was the sort of direct and tangible expression of that at home.

In the beginning of the year, homework was very painful. K & O had a ton of catch-up to to do get on-track with where the other kids at this new school were. They were very far behind, and there was a lot of hard work required just to get through homework each day. Some tears were shed (mostly by me). But by mid-way through the year, K & O were pretty much caught-up and on-track and homework became easier and less painful. By the end of the year, homework was pretty much a breeze, and they were doing it almost entirely independently.

I am so proud of how hard these guys worked (all three of them — but K & O especially). And I am really pleased by the fact that this year was a resilience-building year for them. Homework was just symbolic of it, but they learned that their hard work sometimes really does pay off, and that perseverance can get them through. That made them stronger, I am sure.

Still, I’m not sad (at all!) to see homework go away for a couple of months! In fact, I’m thrilled about it! Glory glory hallelujah the homework is done!

{above: homework toward the middle of the year. note that I’m sitting with them, grading papers while they do their homework}

{below: homework toward the end of the year. note that I’m unpacking lunches, texting on my phone, but… still… drinking a large coffee!}

~ ~ ~

I am, however, a little tiny bit weepy about the fact that our kindergartener is just about done with kindergarten. There is something about moving to first grade that just seems… well… huge. Still, though, I’m nothing but ecstatic about her, too, being done with homework for the summer. Even though it was relatively very little homework, and even though there is not much more darling than watching a little person learn to read, I’m happy to have a break from Meera’s homework too.

{seriously, she is adorable with her little finger pointing diligently at each word as she sounds it out. seriously, she is just plain adorable}

{above: whoops! We didn’t get her homework done the night before! that’s the worst: trying to get the homework done during the morning mania mad rush. on this rarest of days, big brother pinch-hit and took one for the team to get her through that homework}

~ ~ ~

In related news: I packed the last trio-of-school-lunches for the year last night! Now THAT is really something to celebrate!

{note: yes, that’s a glass of red wine in the photo below. yes, I often try to prep the lunches the night before. yes, often at midnight. yes, I have carefully calculated it and I estimate that I made the bambinos approximately 540 packed lunches this year. and yes, a glass of wine makes all that lunch-packing a tad bit less painful}

Cheers tonight to all those care-givers out there who are celebrating the end of the school year! We deserve at least a couple of glasses of wine tonight my friends!

(Blurry, grainy, bad photo taken with my iPhone in dim light. Still, given the story, it is “Photo of the Day” worthy.)

Tonight we went to Carrabba’s for dinner. There was a 30-40 minute wait for a table, so, like we often do, we found 3 seats at the bar. The bambinos sat in them, and Braydon and I stood behind them. Before our drinks had even arrived, Owen had struck up a full-blown, very-interactive, very energetic-and-engaged conversation with an older couple who happened to be seated at the bar next to him. There was golf on the televisions of the bar, and before we had even had two sips of our drinks, Owen and the man were on a first-name basis, and were deep into a very spirited and animated discussion about golf. Over the next 20 minutes Owen and the man exchanged golf stories, belly-laughed at the telling of each other’s funny golf-related-tales, gave-and-received golf pointers and tips and tricks, and discussed the finer points of the Carrabba’s menu. The man and his wife were probably in their mid-60s, and seemed very much alone and reserved when we first had the kids sit down next to them. But quickly they were smiling and chatty and completely charmed by Owen. Soon we got a table, so we got up from the bar. About halfway through our meal the couple from the bar found us, and came up to our table to say goodbye to Owen before they left the restaurant. This is Classic Owen.

That’s all five of us together. We have very few photos of the five of us together. So, for no other reason, I put that up at the top of this blog post. A post which will be pathetically superficial and shallow and very-non-representative of our real life. Because. Well. Because that’s all I’ve got right now. Our life has been so over-the-top fast-paced that I just haven’t been able to fit in reflecting upon it via the blog (regular readers might have noticed: for the past several weeks there’s been just about nothin’ from me on this here old blog). The way I look at it, superficial and shallow and very-non-representative is at least something.

The truth is, sometimes I am just too dang busy to blog. I know, I know, “busy”…. ugh…. “busy”… busy is a relative word (what is “busy” to some is not “busy” to others)…. and “busy” is such a loaded buzz word these days. I refuse to get into that ridiculous, and oh-so-very-popular, “busy competition” of who is more busy that who — God, do I ever hate that game. But, fact: I am super (ridiculously) busy (“busy” defined: “having a great deal to do”). And, fact: I am proud of how much we cram into this short little life we’ve got to live. If we didn’t take time to smell the roses as we go, then it would be highly problematic. But, we do, indeed, take time to smell the roses, so I’ll defend our lifestyle and good and the right kind of life for us. I am known amongst three certain kids on this planet to be regularly reminding them that “you only live once!” and, thus, you should “go for it!” and “make the most of it!” And I’m not ashamed of that way of approaching the one life we’ve got to live.

Make the most of it we do. But lately, there’s been so much, moving so quickly, that I truly could not take the time out to blog it (forcing myself to spend the time to blog would have meant sacrificing those too-few moments of stillness). But I do want to blog it. Because I want to remember at least some of it — I want to try to chronicle some fragment of it — no matter how pathetically superficial and shallow and very-non-representative of our real life that “some of it” might be.

So, here goes. In absolutely no particular order (not chronological, or otherwise). A quick catch-up, barely scratching the surface, on a little bit of some of what we’ve been up to over the past few weeks.

Just as spring gets really beautiful the academic grind gets really ramped up to a grueling and impossible pace around here. I am so grateful to have Dash now, for many reasons. But one of the big reasons is this: using him for a good excuse, I take a walk in the woods every morning. Lehigh has more than 2,000 acres of protected woodlands, right outside our door, with incredible paths throughout. This is one of the reasons I really love living here on campus. Every morning, as soon as the kids are off to school, at 7:30am, when all is very quiet on a university campus, Dash and I head out into the woods.

So, despite the fact that I was more crazed than ever this spring (the ratcheting up of the end-of-academic-year insanity seems to be getting worse by the year), for the first time in many springs, I was able to fully immerse myself in the beauty of it, and appreciate it very fully, for at least 30 minutes every morning. After a very long winter of trudging through the snow and ice in these woods, it was just an astoundingly beautiful experience to watch spring bloom day-by-day.

Somewhere tucked into that jam-packed spring was our favorite event of the year at LU: the Community Service Office’s outreach festival for the South Bethlehem community — Spring Fling. Because Kyle and Owen play baseball for their actual local team (based on their actual residential address; i.e. not fudging it like many families do) — South Side Little League is our team. And as a result, Kyle and Owen have real friends, who are their teammates, in South Bethlehem. One of the highlights of the year for me was watching my boys (professor’s kids) run around the lawn of the University Center with a pack of their good friends (South Side kids). To say that this (genuine relationships between Lehigh faculty folks and South Side folks — let alone their kids) is rare is the understatement of the year. In fact, for real, I think it is unique. We love it in its entirety. Here are K & O with a few of their friends at Spring Fling — somehow Lehigh photographer Christa Neu was able to get these guys to stand still for half a second in order to capture this amazing photo ~

And here’s Meera, doing her thing at Spring Fling (she also rode a mechanical shark like a champ, but that’s a whole other story) ~

We also went to another of our favorite campus spring events: the International Bazaar ~

And there was the 3rd Grade Wax Museum at the bambinos’ school. This was the culmination of weeks and weeks of hard work studying “famous Pennsylvanians” (OMG how am I ever going to survive so many more years of school projects?!?!). Owen chose (and ultimately, became) Kobe Bryant ~

Kyle was Ben Franklin ~

Classic choices for these two very similar, and very dissimilar too, twins. (Note: in a similar vein, earlier this year, for a different project, Owen chose Walt Disney, and Kyle chose Abraham Lincoln.) Anyway, the thing that struck me the most about the entire “Famous Pennsylvanians” project was when I saw Kyle’s drawing of Ben Franklin. One of the (many) parts of the project was to “create a postage stamp portraying their chosen person.” I was awe-struck by the fact that Kyle portrayed Ben Franklin very purposefully with clearly dark brown skin. Fascinating!! Right?!! Fascinating I tell you! Everyday absolutely fascinating stuff is going on left and right all around me with these three incredibly interesting kids of mine.

Meera’s big spring school project was the Kindergarten Science Expo. I was awe-struck at that too — but this time by whoever had the stroke of genius to plan for the kindergarteners’ ‘5th Grade Buddies’ to partner up with them during the expo. Meera’s big buddy was there with her every minute of the expo, helping her to field questions, make her science experiment run, manage the messes, and sooth the nerves of a little girl doing her first big expo event. Genius I tell you! I love this school. They are pure genius at work there!

Oh. And the boys got new bikes this spring. So, yes, there was that. And of course, with new bikes they can now take their biking to a whole new level.

This photo is deceiving. It looks pretty tame, but if you look closely you see that both wheels are actually off the ground ~

Meera falls more and more in love with this dog every day. They have a special relationship ~

There was a trip to the dentist. This seems mundane, I know. The dentist. But it was so not mundane. Because, of course it was not. After Owen’s cleaning was done it was Meera’s turn. And Owen politely requested to be able to observe. The dentist’s office was excited about his interest/passion for the subject of dentistry, and thus were extremely accommodating to what they saw as a potential-future-medical-professional. They placed a chair next to Meera and talked Owen through the entire check-up and cleaning, explaining every tool, and answering all of his (many, many) questions. The dental hygienist and the dentist were both in on this, and caused quite a stir throughout the entire office. (Meanwhile Kyle sat in the waiting room playing with an iPad; he has zero interest in watching people scrape plaque off of his little sister’s teeth.) It was seriously the craziest trip to the dentist I’ve ever experienced.

The main reason for this trip has always been to spend Easter with Grandpa Les. This year it was an especially poignant and memorable visit. Grandpa Les was in decline, and I think we knew it would be the last time we’d see him. He was about to turn 99 years old. And we knew his time with us on earth was coming to a close. Here we are with my beloved grandfather on Easter Sunday 2014 ~

We all returned to Worcester 5 weeks later for Grandpa Les’s funeral. It was a beautiful service honoring and celebrating his long life. We didn’t take photos on that trip (for obvious reasons). But Braydon did snap this one of Meera with two of her “cousins” (my cousins’ kids; I guess that makes them Second Cousins?) ~

There was a trip to Washington, DC to get together with Braydon’s side of the family to celebrate Auntie Sabrina’s 40th birthday. We spent a beautiful spring day at the National Arboretum, which was in full bloom at that time.

This year was Kyle and Owen’s 2nd Annual Weekend Away with MorMor and MorFar (this was their birthday present, and cousin Sadie’s birthday present, from their grandparents). This year they went to Boston for a Red Sox game at Fenway Park (huge deal for K & O!), and then on to Cape Cod for a whale watch! From all accounts it was a great time (photos thanks to MorMor and MorFar) ~

While the brothers were away, Mommy and Papi took Meera for her own special weekend away in Baltimore. This was just as much for Braydon and me as it was for Meera — a little lux get-away for just the three of us. Our rule for the weekend was to do absolutely NOTHING we would do if Kyle and Owen had been with us. According to Meera, “No Sports!” was the golden rule. We vowed to not even eat in a restaurant that had sports on tv. We had an amazing weekend full of art, fashion, shopping, and eating (wow, we had some good food!). Meera’s favorite thing to do in a hotel is to order take-out Chinese food and eat in the hotel room while watching tv; we have done this a few times in the past, and seriously, she loves this… so, we obliged her wishes and did that one of our nights in Baltimore). The whole weekend was sort of heavenly for us three. It is so special to get time alone with one of our kids, and doing it is always a reminder of how important it is to do.

Dash had to stay with friends for most of these trips. He had some fun himself, getting spoiled rotten by various people who doted on him while we were away (he stayed with three different people/families over the course of these various trips). His favorite memory, though, I’m sure, (or maybe it was just my favorite memory?!?), was when Liana and Mike took it upon themselves to take Dash on a day trip to the beach!

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Sometime later this spring, Kyle and Owen did their first triathlon. They had been wanting to do a triathlon for a couple of years now, but I hadn’t been able to find one that would work for us (schedule-wise). Finally I found one that worked out for them to do. They placed 3rd and 4th (10-year-old twin girls beat them!!!). They had a blast and they are now chomping at the bit to do another one. Swim. Bike. Run.

In a totally separate experience, a few weeks before that triathlon, Meera had her first swim race. The bambinos have been taking swimming lessons this spring, and Meera — especially — loves swimming (not just playing in the water, but actual swimming). When she found out about the swim meet, she was eager to do it. We entered her in the freestyle event and she did great! You go Meera! (This was a big moment for her — the discovery that she, too, not just her brothers, can participate in competitive sports and do well). I was super proud of her ~

Speaking of athletes, I was so incredibly proud and gratified and just beaming-with-joy as one of my favorite students of all time, Mackey McKnight, graduated from Lehigh this spring. It was a special honor to be invited to celebrate his graduation with his family the night of commencement. Last year we went to Sarah’s graduation party (that was so special), and it was so special again this year to be invited to another student’s party (it is uncommon at Lehigh — to say the least — for professors to join students’ families at their private graduation parties). Mackey’s family are from New Orleans and Texas, so the party was a dinner out at a very nice restaurant. The bambinos and I went, and it was truly one of the greatest experiences with a student I’ve ever had. I cannot articulate how proud I am of this kid. (“Kid” = misnomer, for sure. But to me, he’s one of my “kids”) ~

Somewhere in there was Grandparents Day at the Swain School. MorMor and MorFar were the bambinos’ special guests ~

And then there is baseball, of course. Spring = Baseball. Our experience with the South Side Bandits Little League is an experience large enough for a full-length book. I cannot even scrape the surface here and do any justice to it. So, I won’t even try. Suffice it to say: our full immersion into South Side Little League is a big part of our family life.

Here’s Kyle at bat ~

Here’s Owen pitching ~

We are still going strong with Little League. We are now in post-season play-offs and the Bandits are holding their own. And once that ends, the “All Star” season begins (heaven help us, K & O have been invited to play on the All Star Team this year, so baseball season is even more never-ending than usual now). Poor Meera. She is dragged to baseball constantly (the schedule is grueling). Luckily there are lots of other little brothers and sisters being dragged to baseball too. They either do this (iPad) ~

Or they do this (run around like little crazy people; if you look closely you can see Meera in a dark dress, playing with all the kids, running down the hill) ~

As I look through all the photos I’ve taken over the course of this whirlwind-of-a-spring (note: the vast majority of our photos these days are snapshots taken with our iPhones), I see lots of food photos. Yes, we are those people who take photos of our food. Often. I’m sure that this means something about us, I’m just not sure what (other than that we have a great appreciation for food?). I have tons and tons of food photos on my iPhone. On this particular night (photo below) we had take-out from Wegmans. Deep into eating sushi and dumplings and green beans (3 of Owen’s most favorite foods), Owen exclaimed: “It is like heaven is in my mouth!”

Sometimes Braydon and I steal away for a lunch date, just the two of us, mid-week. Here’s our Thai lunch and tea one of those days. That is my version of heaven ~

Here are the boys, out of Mexican food, the two of them thoroughly enjoying a bowl of queso dip ~

Lots of food at home too. Spring is the quintessential fresh artichoke season. These two are artichoke lovers (or are they just anything-dipped-in-butter lovers?) ~

The end of May/early June is the height of strawberry season here. The seasons and months and time-passing are marked by certain foods for us. Strawberries are a big right of passage from late spring to early summer for us. The bambinos especially love our annual ritual of eating these beautiful berries dipped in sour cream and brown sugar.

But don’t get the wrong idea. There are plenty of nights that Braydon and I feed the bambinos macaroni and cheese from a box, get them to bed, and then eat something like this for our dinner ~

Moving on from food… there has been lots of flying the remote control airplane that K & O got for their birthday ~

And lots of playing in the sprinkler ~

One day I kept the boys home from school and we played hooky together. Here they are at the start of our day, at Waffle House. That was a special, memorable day. I hope this blog helps me to remember some of these amazing times long after they happen. These are moments I don’t want to forget.

Meera’s end-of-year kindergarten picnic ~

K & O’s end-of-year final 3rd grade field trip ~

Oh, and in there somewhere were the birthdays. Kyle and Owen’s, and Meera’s, and the big birthday party (which would be enough in and of itself to keep me from blogging). May is all good, but it is a crazy-kind-of-busy-good. We couldn’t do a whole year of May’s, but we can do one month of May. And I wouldn’t trade that crazy-whirlwind-of-a-spring for anything.

So much, so fast, so that it all goes by in a blurry haze of ups and downs and highs and lows and joyful painful all-around-good-living life. By the end of the spring, as we are entering summer, the woods now look like this ~

And we are ready for summer to really kick in. Tomorrow’s the last day of school! And we’ve got an amazing summer planned!