Important Question for our Blog Readers: One of the comments below mentions that our blog loads slowly. We want to know about this because we’re trying to work out some things for our newer-better-soon-to-come-best-ever revved up ramped up J-M BLOG! Please tell us~~ does this blog load slowly for you? do you have a hard time getting all the photos to show up? does the blog load slower for you than other internet sites load? PLEASE tell us by leaving a comment here! The more we know, the better. Thanks!
We are — once again (!) — in the midst of planning big renovations to the J-M blog! We could really use your help. Will you please leave a comment here, telling us what you’d most like to see more (or less) of as we move onward and upward into our new-bigger-better–never-a-dull-moment–family blog?
I LOVE your parenting anecdotes, and appreciate the insight in raising a multi-racial family. Thanks for asking!
I just got your email and I am here to TESTIFY!!! Since my Haitian-born son is exactly one month younger than K & O, I (and he) feel a connection. Sometimes I’ll call Colin over and say, hey, guess what Kyle and Owen did this past weekend, then we look at the pictures and read the entry. In fact, Colin has decided he needs to pay better attention in swim class for “when we all have a meeting and have to swim.”
Your blog journals are fascinating–we learn a lot from your adventures with your kids. Your decision to re-open the blog may be a little uncomfortable for you, but it is a great service to the rest of us. I find it quite validating to read about your experiences with how other perceive your family. Because although I am an African-American woman, I am excruciatingly aware of how people judge/patronize my son.
i almost never comment on blogs, but since you asked….i love everything about your blog, and i hate the thought of less pictures. just sayin’ :)……i always appreciate your thoughts on life, adoption, Haiti, recipes/food and everything in between. you are honest and real, and we don’t have to agree 100 % of the time~ I still appreciate your heart and your desire to do your best as wife and mom and just living as a family of five. that’s kind of where most of us are at. and as a wife and mom of many, i appreciate the inspiring creativity you share, and i think it helps me to be even better in my role. that is a good thing! keep up the great blog, and thanks for sharing with us, your readers…
blessings,
Shana from Canada
Hi!
I just wanted to let you guys know that I read your blog everyday! I love it! I will be very sad if you don’t post as many pictures, but I understand. My favorite posts that you do are about the boys’ hair, when you post about your job (Heather) and what you think of raising two black boys, the posts about adorable Meera, I love hearing about the boys’ and their school and activites and, the posts about things that you hear in stores and what people say. I really really love when the boys’ tell you what to write and and then you post a picture of it. It is too cute for words. So basically, I love all of your posts!!
I read your thoughtful words because they have true meaning for me. As a woman and adoptive mama. Many of your stories about the boys and talking about Haiti resonate strongly because my daughter is also Haitian American and we have had familiar conversations. I feel like many people (like myself) no longer write fully about their lives on blogs, that truly sharing and becoming a three dimensional person is rare. I think its smart and courageous to talk about the struggle to balance work-more than work, career, sense of self, purpose, with the desire to be with our children all the time to see how much they change and grow. Keep writing and staying real.
I like everything about your blog and have always felt that you strike a very nice balance!
I’m kind of a foodie…love travel…the mom and grandma of biracial kids whose dad/grandpa is from Haiti, so there is lots for me to find interesting in your writing. My sons were competitive swimmers (yes, black kids CAN swim, contrary to what many people think). Just keep it all coming (with pics) and I’ll continue to be a faithful reader
Well, I love the photos. 😉
Adoption, trauma, attachment, birth parents are the topics I am most interested in.
Thanks for sharing.
It is hard for me at tiimes, because I would love to debate our different parenting styles ad such- but dont want to be cast into the outer darkness
I like the honesty and would not change a thing:)
For me, it is meaningful to read about a family, that is very different from the on I grew up in (in Germany, all white, no adoptions), but in a way very similar to my family (many kids, we were 4, twins, lots of love and respect). If I ever have kids of my own, you will definitely be one of my role models about how to raise kids in this day and age. Thanks for having me here!
please continue posting pictures – the blog would not be the same without the joy that emanates from your family’s faces…while reading your posts, the pictures help to draw me in…so much that I feel that I am there experiencing it all with you!
I love the stories about the traditions and rituals you develop for the kids, and the stories about how each of them is changing and growing. I love the perspective on balancing work and home. I love the photos.
Hello J-Mc’s. I think your blog is ever balanced. I stayed reading because of Heather’s (and occasionally Braydon’s!) writing. The main reason I read is because you truly look at things from a philosophical vantage and then act to be the change you see the need for. That to me is so admirable and riveting to follow. A couple of lovely bonuses are the musings of K&O (which I’d be happy to hear more of) and this adorable girly-girl that keeps popping up in the Haitian-American action shots!! Thankyou for being you.
Heather, I can’t really say there is anything different I’d like to see on the blog. I love the pictures, the stories, your “thoughts”. It’s all great.
I’ll stay tuned as you renovate!
Cheryl
More of the same. Love your stories HBJ.
We love it all, Heather! We catch up on your blog every week or two just to find out what crazy experiences you are having and what amazing things your kids are doing. I love that it allows me to get insight into your world in a way I never could if I only got to catch up once a year at Easter! We are so glad you’re going to keep the blog going! Ann-Elise, Cathy, Graham and Ivy
You rarely comment about the wonderful relationship the children have with each other. Sibling rivalry can be a serious problem, but not really for them. Among other things that’s a tribute to your parenting.
More photos, not fewer!!!!! More posts from Braydon (well, he is my son after all, but he is also a poet).
I love the posts about adoption, twins, and recipes/food. We have 4 year old twin boys and are in the process of adopting our daughter from Ethiopia. Love checking in with you guys!
As the adoptive mom of a black son, I like to hear about adoption, attachment and any racial issues that may come up or have come up that you have had to deal with.
I live in Italy and to boot in a small town where diversity is still a far cry from the norm you see in Canadian and American cities, so some things we’ve had to deal with haven’t been too pleasant.
BTW, my son was TERRIFIED of water, he had his first bath with me in Ethiopia in our hotel room. He started swim lessons at 4 1/2 yrs (arrived at 3 1/2 yrs) and is now starting pre-competitive swimming at his instructors’ request. We’ll have to see how to balance this out with his bi-weekly soccer practices…LOL!
I concur with most here. More of the same…I love the all the stories and pictures. I read about your family and come away with a feeling of peace and joy. Even the struggles, frustrations and tears expressed are appreciated. That you would be transparent, exposing your life, your loves, your thoughts in an online journal has been a blessing to so many. I, for one, am thankful for being allowed to be a witness to your family’s journey.
Loving the view.
Kristine
Hi JMs,
I”m really enjoying reading your blog, especially because your parenting and your children’s childhood resonates so much with mine. I particularly enjoy reading your the dual career household balancing act, as well as adoption and attachment. I also really like how you note down Kyle and Owen’s conversations (which I think they’ll enjoy look over when they grow up) and “naughty” moments. To echo the others your photos are fantastic, and I think you’re approaching this blog in the best way possible – remembering that it is for yourselves and your children as an account of their childhood. Your idea for the summer checklist is great, I will probably adopt that idea in the future!
In terms of what I want to see more of, I’m particularly interested in the Waldorf schooling. Otherwise, I’m happy to go in whatever direction you choose.
My only critical comment is, and I hope this doesn’t sound too harsh, sometimes when reading your large chunks of text it gets a bit overwhelming so just in terms of formatting and how it comes across on the page I think shorter paragraphs would be good.
Thanks again for letting us “virtual” friends/strangers into your lives…I am aware that because I don’t have a blog I am not sharing my life in kind. So if you do feel there is an imbalance or wish for readers to share – just give us a shout!
Take care,
Kate
I also join the legions who say there’s not much to change about this blog! I would say, though, solely from a parenting perspective, it would be helpful to hear about more struggles you guys have had, both as parents and as a family unit, but ONLY if this can be done in a non-airing-dirty-family-laundry way. Know what I mean? It’s great (and fun!) to hear about how good your kids are at everything and how over the top every aspect of your life is (and I’m so glad your kids are awesome and fun-loving and energetic, etc. etc. etc.) but a little more balance from time to time would be certainly appreciated at least by me. I hope this comes off in an “I LIKE YOUR BLOG” way – it’s definitely not meant to be anything negative. I hate to even say it because I don’t want to be banned from reading or anything. And of course, if you feel this can’t be done without removing certain barriers that you’ve intentionally put in place, I totally and completely understand…don’t even consider anything you’re not comfy with.
i’m here for a good read! i love your insight to how grandiose the small details in life are. and i love admiring how you are raising a multi-cultural/bi-racial family. just to name a few off the top of my head – i love it all! thanks for my favorite blog!
o and the recipes rock, too!
I think it’s well balanced. I’ve not stopped in as much since you switched over because for some reason the newer blog takes longer to load and I can’t scroll down and read while the pictures are loading.
I love the stories and pictures of the kids, parenting, food, all of it! Thanks for the window into your family!
I love the blog just the way it is. The way you write is so creative. Your stories come alive. I appreciate your honesty. I love the pictures!!!
My favorite topics are the kids, parenting, balancing work and motherhood, recipes and food.
I’m inspired by your ability, Heather, to work as a professor while raising adopted and biological children, preparing magnificent meals, taking great photos and offering a myriad of opportunities to your children with the love and acceptance. With plans to get a PhD myself and to adopt, I appreciate your willingness to share your experiences.
I love everything about your blog!! I really enjoy your thoughts on dual career families and the food posts, but the blog would definitely not be the same without the kids as the main feature.
Thanks for sharing.
Amy
Hi Heather and Braydon,
I started reading your blog when the boys were around 2 yo, and tracked back to read every entry on your blog. I LOVE the pictures the most–really loved the ones you posted that your son took. He has a great eye! My favorites are insightful posts about your struggles with work-family balance, insight into the boys’ remembrances of their early months, and the challenges of raising two active, energetic boys. I also enjoy the updates on the summer activities from the “to-do” list. Wonderful, creative, simple pleasures that make me want to be a better parent. Thanks so much for sharing your family adventures with us!
OH, and I like the quotes you periodically use as captions or as an introduction to a post.
I love it all. On one hand, I truly enjoy the exclusivity of the private blog, like you are sharing things with us that not everyone is trusted with. On the other hand, I know that your blog truly does make a difference in how black boys are perceived. I know that it has changed the way I look at black teenage boys, and I have taught them in droves for 7 years! My favorites: hair and skin stuff, Q and A entries, your adventures, the food, your insight as a mother who works and raises children at the same time day after day. Hm. I guess I like it all, don’t I? There you have it.
Melissa
I really enjoy your blog, I rarely comment but I was honoured to be taken along with you when you went private.
Your family is an inspiration to me, in many ways. The values you place on family, quality time, travel, education and exclusivity are fantastic. I am on a pHD track and planning on becoming a professor in Art History. As the years go by I find myself thinking, will I be able to be an academic, do the things I love and be a Mom?
Heather does and its amazing to follow through your blog. I’ve been reading for two years and I love following the stories of your family’s lives; you write about your family and its trials and tribulations in such an expressive, intelligent and heartfelt manner that I can’t help but love your blog! Your children are growing up into beautiful people and its a privilege to watch.
My suggestion? I don’t have one, keep it up.
I really enjoy reading your blog and would not change a thing about it. You are both completely honest about the joys, trials and tribulations of simutaneously raising three beautiful children, juggling dual careers and most importantly maintaining a solid and happy marriage. There is just a certain honest and real quality about your blogs. As a former student of Professor Johnson, I can also relate to your family as my husband and I have started our own biracial family. I am African-American, he is Caucasian and our children will be a perfect mix of both. I also wanted to thank you both for sharing such intimate moments of your life with me. Oh and I also like the ways the blogs are written – some flow like poetry and others are just a pure, straight from the heart sentiment.
Ok, “Ladybuglin”– Fess up! Who are you?! A former student of mine?! Tell me who you are!!!!!!!!!!
I really appreciate the honesty of what you are doing. Although I know that being so vulnerable on line can be painful because there are crazy people who say mean things, I want to support your sharing so much with the world. There are so many who can benefit from it. It also makes me happy to see pix of what we have done together!!!
I consider myself to be a potential adoptive parent. I read a large number of “adoption” blogs so that I can witness different viewpoints on adoption and raising a multi-racial family. Because I enjoy cooking, I like seeing the recipes that you sometimes post and your “Food Friday” posts. As someone who studied education in grad school, I enjoy hearing about the boys’ schooling experience. That said, the primary reason that I read YOUR blog is because all five of you seem like lovely people, and I enjoy reading about your journey together as a family. I also appreciate how honest you are, while at the same time, it does not feel like you are overstepping the bounds of your children’s private lives.
I read a number of blogs, and I think the reason I enjoy doing so so much is because when I read about and consider the life of someone who is not quite like me, it helps me to take another view of my own life–what I want, and what is right for me. It is very generous of you to spend time on this, so that all of us strangers can enjoy peeking into your family’s experience.
Hi J-M’s,
I love the blog and both welcome, but understand the trepidation, of going public again. I LOVE the pictures (seriously, how is it that your children are THAT photogenic? I still smile when I think about those precious pictures from Meera’s birthday) but, again, I understand the desire to be more private with them.
The posts that I love the most, and think about the most, are probably the ones that will get you the most ‘hate mail’ when you are public. I love the honest discussions of being working parents, being part of a transracial family, and figuring it all out even though you don’t have all the answers.
On a side note, I was out the other day and saw a very nice family with two caucasian parents and two black daughters. I didn’t want to stare, but in my fairly white neighborhood they were distinct and, frankly, beautiful. I thought to myself “how would Heather want me to handle this?” So I smiled at the girls, gave the mom a “mom to mom” nod, and went about my business.
Keep up the good work J-Ms!
Heather
have been reading for years and love it, and will continue to read for as long as you write. I especially love your writing about Haiti, being a working mom, traveling, and recipes. thanks!
I enjoy reading everyday life and trip stories. I know the wit and humor in the writings and how the good are presenting with the bad.
“Meewa’s big toe on the table as she dreams about b’ooons at her party tomorrow…”
I would be heart-broken if such secret delights were no longer available.
A few months ago you asked for suggestions for Friday’s food theme. I was one who, hesitantly, requested recipes, but worried about over-loading your already busy day. Here I am again wondering how you can take on even more, particularly at this time of the year.
I really enjoy the privacy inherent in the present design, though I acknowledge more families would benefit from the J-Mc family wisdom were you to unlock your door.
Just have to register my vote to remain private.
What an honour it is to sit at your table.
Huggies to all,
Carol
I love to hear everything that Meera, Kyle and Owen are up to! I love to hear about family outings and the funny things the kids say. As a working mom for all these years I feel a connection to all your struggles too!
I love reading about raising a diverse family, and the obvious careful choices you make as parents to educate and illuminate the lives of your children. I also like posts about Waldorf, and Food Fridays! The pics are just icing on the blog cake!
I most enjoy your posts about gender issues, as well as how you handle struggles. I enjoy the insight you share from your heart and appreciate you putting it out there. Thank you.
There is not much I don’t enjoy about your blog. Your family is inspirational! I love reading about your adventures and just the mundane parts daily life. I love reading Food Fridays. I love your pictures. Thank you!
Oh wow, what isn’t to love about this blog! The up and downs of everyday parenting, the wonderful family trips you take and let us be a part of, the fabulous meal ideas you give us. I love it all. I have been visiting your blog for more than two years now (way before little Ms. M), and I just feel like you guys are part of my family.
Keep up the fabulous work guys!
I especially appreciate all the interesting parenting anecdotes, your documentation of the things the children say (eg. your observations on “twinspeak”), and really look forward to see how the children are slowly blossoming into wonderful individuals! Thank you for allowing us to share in your lives.
As others have said before me, what is there not to love on this blog?! I was so excited when I got brought over to the private blog, I felt honored to share your journey with you. I love the pictures, the funny/sad/joyful/embarrassing/loving stories you share, and I would hate to see either of those features disappear because you are forced to censor yourself from negative nancies and the occasional internet troll. I am continually inspired by your family, and it has opened my eyes to both the joys and the hardships that come with adoption. I hope that you continue to share your insight on adoption, and are able to find a balance between a public and a private blog.
-Em
I honestly can’t think of something I’d like to change about the blog…Google brought me to you through a search about locs, of all things, and I hung around because your kids are just so darn cute.
I am tentatively, ever so early in the thinking process of adopting, and so I know that your posts about those issues would have a lot of meaning *for me,* (though maybe not for others.) I would be a single, working mom, so the posts where you honestly grapple with work-life balance issues is also endlessly fascinating to me, though I understand those kinds of posts often bring out the haters.
Anyway, I think it’s great that so many people have obviously contacted you and said that your story has meaning to them. I think that’s awesome! Obviously, whatever you’re doing is working; no need to mess with success!
I very much enjoy reading your blog, and am particularly interested in posts re: raising a multiracial family (we are doing the same), the challenge of balancing career and family (we are doing the same), as well as the cute, funny and wonderful stories about the kids and their various escapades. Two topics I would love to read more about are your choices and perspectives on the kids’ education (Waldorf school etc), as well as the challenges of maintaining a healthy marriage in the midst of the chaos of raising kids and maintaining careers. I recently saw the movie, “The Kids are Alright” with Julianne Moore and Annette Bening. There is a scene where Julianne Moore is trying to find common ground and connect to her teenage kids and partner after making a serious transgression in the relationship. In that speech, she says, “Marriage is a f&*^ing marathon.” I practically jumped out of my theatre seat and said, “Yes! It really, really is!” No matter how much love is shared, no matter how committed both partners are, it’s darn tough sometimes. I am in a happy marriage, and I love my kids etc etc, but some days (weeks, months) are really, really hard. I don’t think I’m alone, but somehow as a society we don’t talk about it all that much. So that’s my long-winded way of saying that should you be open to sharing the joys and challenges, and ways you stay connected as a couple (or not connected), I think that would touch many of us working our way through the same joys and challenges. That may not be something you choose to do since you’re opening up the blog again, but thought I’d put it out there! Keep on writing… love following your stories! Cheers, G
Gloria, Thanks for these thoughts. Yes, we share the same challenges in regards to our marriage! And yes, we ill try to talk more about that. I agree with everything you wrote. ~Heather
I love everything about the blog. Someday it’s going to be a great family history – a treasure that you will ahve taken te time and energy to create and that most of us have not had the foresight to provide for.
Love, MorFar
I specially like the way you tell us about your family and the difficulties that implies. I really like the blog in all his aspects.
Your blog fills me with wonderful memories of bringing up my own two sons. That in and of itself is a true gift but I also love reading about Haiti. I’ve learned lots from you and now contribute when I can to various organizations that are supporting that country. I so appreciate you expressing your ups and downs and I’ve found it is actually helpful for me to remember what you have said when talking to my own grown children about some of the same issues they face. I’ve tried several of your recipes (your Greek chicken dish is my favorite) and I get great ideas for my grandkids. I would not have known about plasma cars without reading about yours and I must say, after introducing them to my family, I am now the best grandma ever when it comes to Christmas gifts. So thanks!
Well, I don’t comment much but stop by regularly to read. I am in the process of adopting a little boy from Ethiopia so I enjoy hearing about other families that are similar what mine might someday be. I also enjoy hearing about the kids and what types of things they are up to, I love how they are outdoorsy and active kids – ideas for the future to keep mine busy.
I enjoy the foodie posts and travel posts as these are both interests of mine too.