I’ll be honest: this past year has probably been the toughest yet for Braydon and I. We’ve been together for fifteen years and married for almost nine of those. We’ve had our ups and downs, our highs and our lows, better years and worse years. This past year has been very, very tough for us. We are 100% dedicated to sticking it out, but we’d be lying if we said these past several months have been easy. In so many respects, it has been very, very challenging for us. We knew we needed a break. Like, a real break. And we knew we needed it badly. But we also knew that we didn’t want to totally sacrifice our vacation with our bambinos in order for us to reconnect and rejuvenate as a couple. It is very hard (impossible?) to do what we wanted (needed?) to do with a baby along. We know that, first-hand, from prior experience. So, we came up with a plan: a trip with just the boys– leaving Meera at home with MorMor and MorFar. K & O are old enough, adventurous enough, and capable-and-experienced-travelers-enough to be able to afford us an awesome time. And Meera would be much happier (being the home-body that she is, at least for now) at home. It all hinged on MorMor and MorFar agreeing to come and stay with her while we went away. Which they did agree to do. What a gift from them. So, the grand plan got set in motion.
This year’s big May vacation was to the island of Hispaniola. The boys’ first time back to the island of their roots since we brought them home when they were eight months old. This was a big deal trip! We had hoped to bring them to Haiti this year, but the earthquake ended the possibility of that dream coming true. It took us a while to re-orient our minds to a new dream. But we did. And none of us are complaining. While we would have liked to have been able to bring K & O to Haiti, for us the Dominican Republic was the next best choice. It allowed for the boys to see a tiny bit (albeit a far cry from Cite Soleil) of the island on which they were born. They know and understand that the DR is not Haiti. But they also know and understand that the countries share one island. We saw enough of the reality of the DR for a bit of that to sink in. And we saw a lot of the beauty of the Caribbean, Hispaniola, and the Dominican Republic. All along our goal had been to expose them to enough, but to show them the breath-taking sheer brilliant beauty of it too. And, in the end, the trip was totally successful on all fronts. The boys came home thinking deeply– and they also came home proud of “their island,” “their people,” and “their place.” We were in La Romana, and we had done our research: not only is there great snorkeling there (K & O’s top priority for this trip), but a lot of Haitians live and work in that region. And we got to meet a lot of Haitian people who were very enthusiastic about bonding with our boys as soon as they found out they were Haitian too. “My brothers!” the Haitians would shout out to K & O, proudly proclaiming to the boys that they are “same colour!” and “same skin!” There were lots of questions, and lots of conversations all around. It was intense at times, but all good. And to top it all off, we had an absolutely fantastically fabulous vacation. Highlights (in addition to the Hispaniola/Haitian connections) included:
- snorkeling snorkeling snorkeling! off the beach of the resort where we stayed, and during a day-trip we took to Catalina Island (a day trip which included a couple hours of riding in a tiny 12-foot out-board-motor boat on the open white-capped Caribbean ~~ very, very crazy, to say the least!!!). highlights of snorkeling included seeing a cow fish; underwater ‘meadows’ of huge sand dollars; humongous bright orange starfish; angel fish; sergeant major fish; parrot fish; surgeon fish; yellow tail; millions of sea urchins; and even an eel! Kyle and Owen are really good snorkelers. At age just-barely-six they are really, seriously, really, really super-good snorkelers. I don’t want to brag on them too much, but seriously, they are really good at snorkeling.
- boating every day! paddle boat, kayaks, the above mentioned “speed boat,” and — the creme de la creme — an hour-long catamaran sail with Mama at the helm!
- the boys’ first massages! no kidding. we all four had massages the first day. total, total indulgence. worth every single cent.
- drinking and dining! turns out the boys love pina coladas (virgin ones, of course) almost as much as their parents do (the non-virgin ones, of course)! and we all loved eating lunch on a gorgeous terrace overlooking the water each day… and trying the various resort restaurants for dinner each night. Our favorite dinner spot was a restaurant called the “Jungle,” which was totally outdoors, in a mangrove area, in the sand on/by the beach. It served Dominican food and it was awesome. We ate conch, shrimp (Owen’s favorite), rice and beans (Kyle’s favorite), grouper, and goat. Caramelized banana and papaya for dessert. We ate there twice and those were heavenly evenings for all four of us. And drinking and dining out all vacation long meant no cooking and no cleaning for H & B. (this is big because it was our first trip since having kids that we have vacationed this way… it was glorious!!!)
- no toys! We have always had a J-M policy that for any child 18-months-old or older, we bring no toys on vacation. None whatsoever. Period. This works out amazingly well, and none of our kids have ever blinked an eye at it (or even seemed to notice). One of the things Braydon and I love about vacations is watching to see what our kids do with nothing at all. It is amazing to see their creativity. One example from this trip was that K & O invented a way to play tic-tac-toe at the table using knives and salt/pepper packets. They wound up doing this during many a meal.
- exploring exploring exploring! coral coastline and sandy beaches and flora and fauna for as far as the eyes can see = hours of endless adventure. playing with hermit crabs and all kinds of crabs were huge hits! looking for birds, fish, turtles, snails, coconuts, bananas… it just doesn’t get any better.
- lounging at the pool (we love that) and reading (for this trip we bought and brought with us the boys’ first real chapter book: The Swiss Family Robinson!!!).
- going to bed late and waking up early! K & O were awesome. They were thrilled to stay up until 9 or 10 each night (way past their normal bedtime)! And their parents were thrilled to have them sleep in until 8 or 9 each morning (way past their normal wake-up time)!
- the resort was gorgeous and lived up to all of our expectations. Braydon and I had been to the DR once before (before K & O were born), but we had gone to Punta Cana. That was a totally different experience than what we had in La Romana. La Romana was much more our speed– relatively off the beaten path, low-key, and very few Americans. A true break from reality in the best possible ways.
- as usual for our family trips……. the best part of all: bonding bonding bonding. It was awesome to spend time together doing things that all four of us truly, genuinely love to do… and to do them TOGETHER. This trip did what we needed it to– it brought us back together and revived us to carry forward.
We came home to a very happy Meera. She was happy the whole time we were gone. MorMor and MorFar spoiled her rotten. And she was happy to see us when we got home.
Life is an adventure!
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